Dreaming Of Reality's Nightmares
by Don'tReadMyStories
Summary: I stared through the bars that held me in this h***. Little did I know that, when I would be set free, it would be much worse, because the one that believed in me didn't anymore. Thanks to jelissalover for all your help.
1. Drive Slow Inside The Cell

*FLASHBACK*

My sweaty palms gripped the steering wheel so tightly that my callusses burned. My nostrils filled with the smell of gasoline and cigarette smoke. I felt sick, but I knew I couldn't back down now-not when I had to beat him. After all, I needed the extra confidence boost if I was going to ask Mel out.

Will she even say yes?

I watched my opponent from the corner of my eye while trying to forget about the girl who was on my mind every second.

There he was, winking at one of the many scantily clad girls that surrounded us. They were all chanting his name.

Everything was a blur around me.

All I heard was, "Moe! Moe!"

Then a picture of Mel flashed through my mind. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson…if you want me to be." That sentence ran through my mind every time I was about to do something big: walk into school for the first time after the crash, go to the court date that could change my life, and have an interview that was broadcasted on national television; anything and everything. I must have been doing something really big because her soothing voice was all I heard.

Who would want to be there for me? After all, I was just Cody Jackson-nothing special about me. Sure, I survived twenty-eight days on an island, and, when I came back, I was arrested and given probation. I guess that wouldn't make me special-just a bad guy. But Melissa was still there for me.

I heard Ricky rev up his engine, trying to intimidate me as he gave me a mischievous grin and wink. This guy is really p***ing me off.

That's why I did it. That's why, when the girl in short denim shorts and a tight tank top held up the orange flag signaling the start of the race, I hit the gas pedal.

Adrenaline shot through my body as I looked back and saw that I was well ahead of him. It looked like he was turning.

What the h***?

All of a sudden, I heard sirens.

Moe honked twice before he zoomed off.

That son of a b****.

But my thoughts were interrupted when a cop car came up from behind me and one from the front.

S***! What am I going to do?

All I could think of was to keep driving.

"This is the police. Stop the car!" Two more police cars pulled up, one on each side.

I was blocked in.

Seeing how there was no way out for me, I stopped the car and slowly got out, cursing to myself, then put my hands in the air wishing that I had never come here because I, Cody Jackson, just participated in my first illegal street race and got caught.

I felt the metal cuffs on my wrists and knew this was not going to end well.

*END FLASHBACK*

That's how I ended up here, sitting in this jail cell on a rusty old bench beside a motorcyclist with a long white beard and a tattoo on his bicep reading, "_MOM_."

All I heard was my social my caseworker's voice yelling, "Does probation not mean anything to you?!"

I just sat there quietly while my caseworker went on yelling at me.

"How could you do this?! What were you thinking?! Oh, I'll tell you what you were thinking! Nothing! That's what you were thinking!"

I had heard enough of his yelling. So I said something that I don't say too often. But I seem to be saying it a lot today. "I'm sorry."

He continued his rant. "Cody, you're on probation. You can't just go around doing whatever you want."

"How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?"

"Cody, sorry doesn't mean anything, especially when you don't mean it." he said. He met my eyes with a steady gaze. "I can't get you out of this one."

I hung my head. I'd really messed up this time.

* * *

I sat in the jail cell, fiddling with my hands, my head low, deep in thought.

What have I done? I was going to ask Melissa to be my girlfriend. She was waiting for me at the her favorite restaurant. She'd think I blew her off. I have to get out of here. I need to talk to Mel.

"Hey." I got up and walked over to the bars of the cell. "When do I get my phone call?"

A couple minutes later, an officer came over and unlocked the door. He led me to a phone.

I picked up the receiver and dialed Melissa's number.

It rang a few times before someone answered. "Hello?" It wasn't Melissa. It was a guy. The voice was familiar, but I couldn't recall who it was. It wasn't Nathan, Eric, Ian, or Lex. "Who is this?"

"It's Jackson. Who is this?" I shot back. "Where's Melissa?"

"She went to the restroom. Uh, we're kinda on a date, so can she call you back some other time?"

"Listen, you son of a-" The person on the other line hung up. "S***!" I said aloud. I slammed the phone back on the hook and followed the police officer back to the cell.

I lay on the bottom bunk of the bed, one arm under my head. With my free hand, I fingered my necklace. The small cross on it was cold from my touch.

I got the necklace when I was little. My mom gave it to me, and it was my most and only valued possession.

I gripped it in my hand tightly and began to pray like Big Jay had taught me to.

Big Jay was a guy who had a garage and let kids like me come in and work on cars. While Big Jay taught us some new mechanical and job skills, he trained our souls. He taught us about religion. One time, my CDSS caseworker, Dan Rosenthal-the man yelling at me earlier-followed me to Big Jay's garage in my old neighborhood. He wanted to bust me because he had it out for me. Big Jay had told him that I could do things with an engine that he wouldn't believe. He'd said that I was a little weak in the religion department though.

But now I needed faith. I needed Melissa.

All of a sudden, a sharp pain went through me as I hit the floor.


	2. Thrown Out With The Trash

I walked around, only half paying attention to the trash on the ground. I was thinking about something else...someone else.

Who was that guy that had answered Melissa's phone last night? Does Melissa hate me? Does she think I stood her up? Well, I did, didn't I? Why was I so stupid?

The traffic on the highway was pretty slow. The cars would move slowly and then completely stop. This continued while I kept picking up more trash.

All of a sudden, I heard a car honk its horn. Looking up, I saw Eric in a Lexus with Taylor, who was driving.

I looked toward the officers watching us pick up trash. They weren't looking this way so I walked closer to the Lexus.

"Hey, Chief," Eric greeted.

"S'up?" I said, tilting my head up a bit.

"We heard about the street race. That sucks," Eric said.

"Hey, what happened to your eye?!" Taylor asked.

*FLASHBACK*

I lay on the bottom bunk of the bed, one arm under my head, the other fingering my necklace, and began to silently pray. I needed faith. I needed Melissa.

Before I could finish, someone grabbed my ankle and threw me to the floor. I looked up and saw the biker guy, the one I shared the cell with.

Lucky me.

He looked down at me. "Get up." The biker guy grabbed my shirt and pulled me to my feet. "That's my bed. You sleep up top. You got that?"

I didn't say anything.

He slammed me against the wall. "Am I clear?!"

"Crystal," I said, wincing in pain as he slammed me into the wall again.

"I like you, kid. Me and you are gonna be great friends." The biker guy intentionally punched my arm hard.

I knew we would be the farthest thing from friends.

He turned to walk to the bunk bed. "Why don't you give your best friend half of you food everyday?" It wasn't a question.

"No," I said.

"What did you say?" The biker guy turned back toward me.

I stepped forward, looking straight in his eyes. "I said no. You're not my friend. And

you're not getting half of my food."

The biker guy looked surprised, like no one had ever stood up to him before.

Then I felt a sharp pain in my eye and everything went black.

*END FLASHBACK*

"Uh, the cops did that when I got arrested," I lied, which I don't do a lot. I wondered if they'd buy it. They did.

"Is it contagious?!" Taylor said worriedly.

Eric and I just stared at her.

Seeing she was serious, Eric spoke up. "Yeah, it is, Taylor. You'll get a black eye just like him, even if you're around him, even for a couple seconds."

"Oh," Taylor said, like she didn't care. After a second, she quickly pulled into the next lane and almost caused a wreck. Taylor got into the farthest lane, unable to move forward, trying to get as far away as possible.

A small grin appeared on my face.

I started picking up more trash. Thinking about Melissa again, I wondered if she knew where I was. If she did, why didn't she visit?

A couple minutes passed. I head another car horn honk and I looked up to see Daley, with Nathan driving in the seat beside her, and Lex sitting in the back.

I checked to see the if the officers were looking this way. They still weren't paying any attention to me.

I turned back to Nathan's Nissan. "Hey."

"Hey, Jackson," Lex said.

"Have you guys talked to Melissa lately?" I asked.

"Nope, haven't seen her," Daley said.

"I talked to her yesterday. She was all excited about something that she was going to do last night. I couldn't understand what she said after that because she was so excited."

I knew why she was excited. It was because I asked her to meet me, and she probably knew why. But I didn't show. I broke her heart. What is wrong with me?

"Jackson?" Daley said, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"What? Yeah? Did you say something?" I said.

"Look. My dad's the District Attorney. I'll talk to him and see if he can get you out of jail," Nathan said.

"Thanks, man."

"Alright well we got to go," Nathan said.

"Jackson?" Lex said.

"Yeah, buddy?"

"I'll see you soon," he said. With that Nathan drove up and soon was far away.

"Hopefully," I mumbled to myself as if responding to Lex's statement.

Before I turned back to pick up more trash, I spotted a familiar face: Melissa.

The car stopped beside me. She wasn't alone. In the driver's seat sat Moe, the guy who stabbed Big Jay. My so-called "friend" from my old neighborhood. The guy who answered Melissa's phone. The guy I was gonna street race with. The guy that got away.

*FLASHBACK*

"S'up, Cody."

"What do you want, Moe?" I said in a flat tone.

"Hey, I'm just trying to chat with a friend," he said defensively.

"You're not my friend," I said.

"I'm not your friend? After all we've been through? After all I've done for you?"

"You haven't done s*** for me except get me thrown in jail for murder," I shot back.

"What was I supposed to do? Turn myself in?"

I didn't answer.

Moe continued. "I couldn't turn myself in. The gang needs me. I'm their leader. They're nothing without me." He paused. "You're nothing without me."

"What the h*** are you talking about? You're just some ***hole in distress that's too f***ing stupid to see it. I don't need you. I've gotten a second chance and everything was going great after I left the gang."

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about. The gang is mad that you left, and they said they were going to hurt you for leaving them," Moe said.

"I'm not stupid, Moe. I know you put them up to it."

"Well, you know we'll win, Cody. I'll win. I always do."

"F*** you! I could beat you anytime, anywhere."

"I'll take you up on that," Moe said.

"Name it."

Moe said, "Right here. Right now. You and me. Street race."

"You're on."

*END FLASHBACK*

"Melissa, I-"

"Save it, Jackson. You stood me up."

"No, I can explain."

"I don't want to hear it, Jackson. I can't believe you. You knew I liked you, and you hurt me. You're such an ***hole. I never want to see you again."

"But-"

"Shut up, Jackson! I'm done with you!"

"Melissa, wait!"

Moe drove on. I saw him kiss Melissa, then she kissed him back.

"Melissa!" I yelled after her. But she was gone.

"Cody, get back to work," one of the officers warned.

I turned and started picking up more trash, getting frustrated. "Why can't these lazy-*** people take their trash to a f***ing garbage can themselves instead of having someone else pick it up for them," I mumbled to myself. My vision began to blur.


	3. A Dead Beat's Beatings

I sat in the cafeteria, staring down at my almost empty tray, then looked back up to the guy with the tattoo. I'd found out that his name was Billy. He sat, chewing. His tray was loaded with food...my food.

But I didn't dare say anything. So I just ate what was on my plate without a word.

* * *

I lay on the top bunk, tired and hungry, and especially bored. It reminded me of when I was on the island. It was no where near worse than this. I had friends there to talk to. I liked to sit and watch the ocean and feel the warm breeze. I even missed eating fruit everyday. But the thing I missed most was freedom. And here, in this jail cell, there was no one I could talk to, no Melissa, no ocean or warm breeze, no fresh or ripe fruit, and definitely no freedom.

I looked at the cell bars.

Billy stepped into the cell, and an officer locked the door behind him. He'd gotten a visitor. Even Billy-the mama's boy biker-could get a visitor.

But I couldn't.

Nobody wanted to see me. No one cared about Cody Jackson. Not my foster mother. Not my caseworker. Not Nathan. Not Taylor. And not Melissa.

Billy sat on the bottom bunk, smiling to himself. Then he spread out on the bottom bunk to go to was silence for a while.

Then my stomach growled.

Billy turned over on his bed.

My stomach growled again."Can you shut that thing up?" Billy said.

I didn't say anything. I just hoped my stomach wouldn't growl anymore.

A couple minutes passed in silence. Billy had relaxed again to go to sleep. I was about to fall asleep, too, until I heard my stomach.

In a flash, Billy got out of his bunk and grabbed my arm, pulling.

I tumbled to the floor.

Billy picked me up by my shirt and threw me back to the floor. He then kicked my side with all his strength.

I yelped in pain, grabbing my ribs. I saw Billy get ready to kick again. I tried to dodge it, but got a blow to my stomach. I yelled.

Finally finished, Billy sat back on his bunk to go to sleep.

I didn't move. I couldn't. It hurt too much. I just lay on my good side, a hand clutching my other side. I tried to sleep, but failed. I was shaking, worried that my stomach would growl again. My head rested on the cold, hard floor. A tear escaped my eye and rolled down the side of my face.

* * *

I woke up, freezing cold and shivering on the floor. I looked around.

Billy was asleep, snoring loudly.

I tried to stand up, but it hurt too much. I forced myself to sit up and slowly pushed myself to a corner of the cell. I rested my head on a wall and fell asleep again.

* * *

Someone kicked my foot. My eyes jerked open. I looked up to see Billy.

"Wake up, kid." he said. "You missed breakfast." Seeing that I was awake, he turned to sit down on his bed.

I slowly stood up, using the wall for support. I wasn't hurting much anymore. I leaned against the wall, then walked over to the bunk bed and carefully climbed to the top, sitting with my feet dangling above Billy's head.

"So how'd you get in here?" Billy said, breaking the long silence.

Hesitantly, I answer. "Street racing." After a minute, I asked, "What about you?"

He sighed. "I had to pick my mom up from one of her friend's house. I was drunk. My mom's too old to drive. So that's why I drove. I was all over the place, speeding. Then I swerved the car to avoid hitting a deer and we flipped a couple of times." He paused. "She didn't make it. So I got locked up for drinking and driving."

I stayed silent.

"Do you know how it feels to have a father that doesn't care about you and a mother that's dead?" Billy said, his voice rising. "To have only one person that actually cares? She's hurt deep inside, but she won't show it. I know she's mad at me."

I knew he must be talking about a girlfriend or wife.

"And you probably live with these rich parents. The kinds that go around and sleep with other people."

I didn't dare argue with him.

"And you've probably got a fancy house, a lot of nice cars, and a lot of money. And you got all these people that care about you, a couple girlfriends you don't even like."

I stayed silent, no matter how much I wanted to protest.

"And I ask myself, 'Why me? What did I do to deserve this? What is wrong with me?'"

I ask myself those questions all the time.

"I don't understand what I did wrong. I don't understand why you rich kids complain so much about life. You get everything. Why did I get this crummy life? How did you get so lucky?" There was silence. Then he exploded. "I f***ing hate rich people! I f***ing hate you!" He grabbed my ankles and pulled.

I fell to the floor.

He started punching me and kicking my sore side.

I tried to run, but there was nowhere to go.

He picked me up by the back of my shirt and threw me against the wall.

I dropped to the floor.

He grabbed my shirt in his fists and slammed me against the wall.

I flinched slightly. "Wait. I'm not-"

Billy, still holding my shirt in one hand, used his free hand and punched my lower stomach.

I doubled up in pain, the air knocked out of me.

While I was bent over, clutching my stomach, Billy's knee made contact with my face. He slammed he against the wall some more.

"F*** you!" I spat in his face, then punched wildly, trying to get free.

Billy grabbed one of my arms and twisted me around, bending my arm behind my back, almost breaking it.

I yelled out. My face was squished against the wall.

"How do you like this, rich kid? This'll be happening to you every day. So get used to it."

I kicked backwards with my leg, hitting him in that place a guy does not want to be hit in.

He let go.

I tried to keep my balance to stay standing. Then I kicked him in the face while he was still bent over.

He fell back onto the floor.

I got on top of him and punched again and , thinking he'd had enough, I got up and moved to the bunk bed. I began to climb up when he grabbed my foot. I slid down, hitting my face on the bar of the top bunk. I hit the turned me over, onto my back.

I looked up at him, pure anger in his eyes. Not because he thought I was rich, but because I fought grabbed me by my hair and slung me toward the bunk bed.

I landed on the bottom bunk.

He started toward me with an evil grin.

When he got to me, I kicked him.

He fell back a little, then came at me again. He got on top of me, trying to pin me while he punched.

I tried to push him off, to no avail. "Get off me!"

Billy kneed me in my lower stomach.

I yelped.

He changed positions, putting his knees on my elbows, pinning them.

I was unable to fight back.

He grabbed my shirt in his fist with one hand, punching with the other.

I tried to wriggle free, but couldn't. Thinking of only one possible way to get out of this, I bit his hand that had a hold of my shirt.

He let go, loosening his grip a bit.

I was able to slide out from under him and roll onto the floor. I started crawling to the metal bars. I reached out for one but was pulled back before I could grab it.

He dragged me to the other side of the cell.

"Let go of me!" I said, struggling to grab a hold of something...anything.

He pulled me to my feet, slamming me against the wall, getting ready to punch.

"Billy, stop...please..." I begged.

He punched my face.

"I'm sorry! Please, just stop. You're hurting me. Please! Stop! I'll do anything! I'll give you all my food. And the bed, the top bunk, too. It's yours. I'll give you everything I get. Just stop it! Please, Billy! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" My vision was blurry. "Please...don't..."

"Shut the f*** up!" There was a burning flame in his eyes, dancing with anger.

I was silent, afraid to scream out. I closed my eyes, tears spilling out. I began to pray silently.

All of a sudden, Billy yanked the cross of my neck and stuck it in his pocket.

"Hey! My mom-"

Getting angry, Billy slammed me against the wall, then punched me. "I thought you said I could have everything."

"But-"

He cocked his head, as if saying '_You want me to punch you again?_'

"Fine. Take it. But, please, stop. It hurts. I can't take it anymore."

With that, Billy smirked. He was satisfied...but he wasn't done yet.

I met his eyes. His were full of hate and anger. Mine were full of helplessness, fear, and pain.

"Why are you doing this to me?" I said, barely audible.

He started laughing, enjoying the pain he caused me, like everyone else seemed to do. He slammed me up against the wall again, then grabbed my throat, lifting me into the air. He was still smiling.

I fought to get free. After about a minute, I started to run out of oxygen. My feet couldn't reach the floor. I struggled to get down.

Billy watched me closely, an evil smile played on his eyes suddenly felt droopy.

My vision grew slung me across the room, toward the bunk beds.

I hit the ground , unable to only a couple of days, I had lost my new family, my friends, Melissa, and now, my faith.

I could hear a voice in my head. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson…if you want me to be." It replayed over and over in my head. I wonder if she still cares about me. She probably didn't. She hasn't come to visit me at all. She has a new boyfriend now. "I'm done with you!" She doesn't love me anymore. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson…if you want me to be." I thought she'd be here for me. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson…if you want me to be." Where was Melissa now?


	4. Tears On A Friend's Shirt

I ran as fast as I could, but Nathan caught up to me. He leaped, and we crashed to the ground. Moe pulled be to my feet, holding me tight.

I tried to run away, but couldn't.

He and Nathan pulled me under a streetlight.

There was nothing but darkness and approaching shadows. From all directions, people surrounded me. I turned to see Daley, Taylor, and Abby. Then, Lex, Eric, Ian, Jory, and Captain Russell appeared, all with serious expressions on there faces. Dan Rosenthal stood next to them, along with Big Jay. Nathan and Moe let go of me, joining the others in the circle.

Then I saw Billy, walking towards me.

I tried to back up, but my back was against the streetlight.

Billy stopped in front of me.

I gulped.

He spat in my face, then made a fist and punched my lower stomach.

I fell to my knees, coughing.

Nathan and Moe stepped out of the circle and walked over to me. They pulled me up and put my hands around the streetlight pole, handcuffing them in front of me.

Lex handed Billy a whip.

Billy ripped the back of my shirt open.

I braced myself, knowing what was coming next.

The whip made contact with my skin.

I winced, leaning my head against the pole, fighting back tears. I tried to keep my breathing steady. Forgetting to prepare myself, I yelped when the whip slashed my back again.

It came again, faster this time, harder.

Everyone seemed to be enjoying this but me.

After a couple more slings, I was screaming in pain, dropped on my knees.

Finally, Billy stopped.

I looked up, hoping they'd let me go, wanting to see Nathan bringing the key to the handcuffs and unlock them.

Instead, I saw Melissa standing next to me, inches away. She held a gun to my head.

"Mel...don't...please," I said, my voice shaking. "Don't do this to me, Mel. Mel, please!"

She didn't move a muscle.

"I-I'm sorry, Mel," I said, my voice cracking. "I didn't mean to. I swear. I can explain."

Melissa cocked the gun.

"Mel, please don't!" I was in tears now. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I'm an ***hole. Please, forgive me. I'll do anything. Just, please, let me go. I'll give you whatever you want. Anything."

She moved the gun so it touched my head, showing she didn't care what I had to say.

Everyone watched, waiting.

"S***! Please, Mel!" I yelled at her. "You don't want to do this. I'll do anything. I'll always be there for you from now on. I promise."

"Now, now, Cody Jackson. You shouldn't make promises you can't keep," Melissa spoke up. "Besides, I don't want that anyway."

"Then what the f*** do you want?!" I yelled.

"You...dead." Melissa moved her index finger, about to pull the trigger.

"Wait, wait!"

Melissa paused.

I continued. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for being such an a**. I'm sorry I'm so stupid. I'm sorry I didn't show up. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I'm so f***ed up. And I know I don't deserve you, but you're all I've got. And-I...I love you, Mel."

Melissa pulled the trigger.

* * *

"Nooo!!!!!!" I shot up in the bed, clutching my ribs in pain. I hurt all over. I was sweaty and shaking. I looked around, wondering where I was.

All of a sudden, Nathan walked in the door.

"Leave me alone!" I said. I tried to get as far away from Nathan as possible, scooting out the side of the bed that is furthest from the door. I immediately fell to the floor, pain shooting through my body. I rushed to me. I became frightened. "Don't hurt me! Please! I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!" I tried to get away, backing against the wall, trapped.

"Hey, hey, hey. You're okay. I'm not going to hurt you." Nathan slowly sat beside me, comforting me.

I sobbed into Nathan's shoulder.

After a while, I fell asleep.

Nathan carefully put me back into the bed and left the room.

* * *

I woke up, then stretched, yawning, but quickly stopped when pain shot through my body. I lay there for a while, wondering where I walked into the room. I looked up. "N-Nathan? Where am I?" I paused a beat. "Am I dead?"

"No, you're not dead. You're at my house. You'll be okay." There was a long silence that lasted up to ten minutes. Then, Nathan broke it. "Jackson..."

I looked at him.

"Wh-what happened to you?"

I thought about the previous night. A shiver went through my body. "Where's Billy?"

"Who's Billy?"

I was silent.

"Come on, Jackson. You need to tell me. What happened to you?" Nathan paused for brief moment. "Did Billy do this to you?"

I looked up to see Nathan watching me. I was trembling, scared. My head hurt. My body ached. My heart was pounding against my chest. "You-you can't let him get me, Nathan. Please, help me," I begged, my face filled with fear.

Nathan looked at me, wondering what happened to the Jackson he used to know.

I tried to calm my breathing. Changing the subject, I said, "Is my head okay?"

"What do you mean?" Nathan asked.

"Melissa shot me," I said. "And you...you handcuffed me to a pole." I paused, suddenly realizing. "You're helping then."

Nathan looked at me like I was loosing it.

Maybe I was. Maybe I already had.

"What are you talking about?" Nathan said.

"You handcuffed me to a pole. And Billy slung a whip at me. And...and Melissa shot me." I reached up to touch my head. There was no gun wound.

"I think you were dreaming."

"No...no. I really felt it. It happened. I was there. You were there, too. And everyone from the plane crash. And Big Jay, Moe, Mr. Rosenthal, and...Billy."

"Jackson, you were dreaming. You woke up screaming this morning from a nightmare. That must have been what you were dreaming about."

I considered this.

There was silence. Then Nathan said, "Will you tell me what happened to you, Jackson?"

I played dumb. "What are you talking about?"

"You know what I mean: the bruises, the cuts and scratches, the broken bones."

I tried to changed the subject. "I have broken bones?"

"Jackson!"

"...I-I can't."

"Yes, you can. C'mon, Jackson. Tell me. What happened?"

"I'm not telling."

"Okay. Fine," Nathan said. "I guess we'll just have to pay Billy a little visit."

My eyes shot toward Nathan. "You can't. Nathan, please. Don't do this. He-he'll kill me." I could tell that Nathan couldn't stand to see me so helpless.

But he wouldn't back down. "That's a risk I'm willing to take."

My eyes were wide with horror. "You wouldn't."

"Try me."

I thought to myself.

Nathan did always get what he wanted. But me...well, that wasn't really an option. I knew I'd have to tell him sooner or later.

I gave in. "S***!"

Nathan smiled, happy he'd won. "So, you gonna tell me about it?"

"Do I have a choice?"

Nathan shook his head. "No."

I sighed, then took a deep breath before I began.

*FLASHBACK*

I sat up, feeling pain.

Billy was pinching my ear, his fingernails digging into my skin.

I stood up before he had the chance to pull me to the floor.

"What did I tell you about sleeping on my bunk?" Billy said.

"I'm sorry, Billy. I forgot. I promise, it won't happen again."

"You're darn right it won't." He squeezed my ear tighter, nails digging deeper. He tugged my ear, then, unexpectedly, yanked it hard.

I yelped. My head would move where he led.

Billy laughed. He twisted my ear in weird, painful ways.

"Please, stop."

"Quit being such a whiney baby."

"I'm not a baby," I hissed, pushing his hand away from my ear.

He reacted violently, charging his head into my stomach, like a football player.

I slammed into the wall, clutching my stomach.

Billy slapped me hard across the face with the back of his hand.

I fell sideways on the floor, holding my cheek. "Billy, wait. Stop."

His foot sprang backwards, about to kick with all his might.

"Billy, no!" I yelled. "Don't do it. Please! No!"

His foot came down, hard, into my side.

I turned over towards the wall, unable to get out of this. "S***! D***it, Billy! F***!" I said through clenched teeth, grabbing my side.

His boot came down again, this time in my back since I was facing the wall.

"S***! Billy, you have to f***ing stop this! Quit!" I tried to turn over to look at him, which wasn't such a great idea.

His foot came again, this time right in my face.

"D***it, Billy! Why are you doing this to me, huh?! I didn't do s*** to you! I didn't do s***! Stop this!" There was more blows going all over my body. "Billy, why can't you leave me the f*** alone?!" I used all my strength to stand up. "Does it make you feel better beating up kids a whole lot younger that you? Is that it? Why can't you pick on somebody your own f***ing size?!" After a moment, I continued in a quieter voice. "Why do you do these things to me, Billy? What the f*** did I do to deserve this s***?!" I got louder with every word in that last sentence. I was shaking, barely able to stand. I stared straight into Billy's eyes.

He was taken aback, shocked that, after all he's done to me, I'd still stand up to him.

Well, I was pretty surprised, myself.

His eyes still danced with anger. After Billy recovered from the shock, he lifted his knee into my lower stomach.

I bent over, doubled up.

He kicked me from behind and I fell to the floor.

I turned over, onto my back.

Billy was walking toward me.

I used my elbows to crawl backwards. "Billy, wait. I'm sorry. I-I didn't mean it." I continued leaped on me, one knee baring down on my lower stomach, a fist grabbing my shirt.

He grabbed my hair with his free hand and yanked my head to his.

Our noses were centimeters apart.

"Don't you ever speak to me like that again! You understand?"

I just stared in his eyes.

"You understand?!" he said, yanking my hair some more.

I nodded my head quickly. "Yes."

"Yes, what?"

"Yes, sir."

*END FLASHBACK*

I told Nathan every detail about what had happened while I was in jail. Then I told him about when Melissa shot me, now believing it was a dream. I told him everything I remembered about the last couple of days. When I was finished, I watched him, wondering what he was thinking.

His eyes were wide, mouth open, in shock. "He...he did that to you?"

I just shrugged like it wasn't a big deal.

Nathan's dad Nelson appeared in the doorway. "Nathan, I need you to run down to the store and pick up a few things."

"Okay, dad."

Nelson saw that I was awake. "Hey, Cody. Glad to see you're up. How you feeling?"

"Better."

"That's good."

"Thanks for letting me stay here. I'll leave as soon as I can."

"No, no. It's okay. Take as long as you need."

"Thanks."

"Hope you get better soon."

"You and me both."

Nelson chuckled a bit, then walked out of the room.

"Alright, well I gotta go. I'll check up on you later," Nathan said.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah."

"Get some rest."

"See ya."

"Bye."


	5. A Visitor's Gold Feet

I looked up, hoping they'd let me go, wanting to see Nathan bringing the key to unlock the handcuffs.

Instead, I saw Melissa standing next to me, inches away.

She held a gun to my head.

"Mel...don't...please," I said, my voice shaking. "Don't do this to me, Mel. Mel, please!"

She didn't move a muscle.

"I-I'm sorry, Mel," I said, my voice cracking. "I didn't mean to. I swear. I can explain."

Melissa cocked the gun.

"Mel, please don't!" I was in tears now. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I'm an ***hole. Please, forgive me. I'll do anything. Just, please, let me go. I'll give you whatever you want. Anything."

She moved the gun so it touched my head, showing she didn't care what I had to say.

Everyone watched, waiting.

"S***! Please, Mel!" I yelled at her. "You don't want to do this. I'll do anything. I'll always be there for you from now on. I promise."

"Now, now, Cody Jackson. You shouldn't make promises you can't keep," Melissa spoke up. "Besides, I don't want that anyway."

"Then what the f*** do you want?!" I yelled.

"You...dead." Melissa moved her index finger, about to pull the trigger.

"Wait, wait!"

Melissa paused.

I continued. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for being such an a**. I'm sorry I'm so stupid. I'm sorry I didn't show up. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I'm so f***ed up. And I know I don't deserve you, but you're all I've got. And-I...I love you, Mel."

Melissa pulled the trigger.

* * *

I shot up, breathing heavily, sweating, shaking. I checked the clock beside me. 3:08. I tried to calm my breathing.

Nathan walked into the room. "You have some people here to see you."

Daley and Lex walked in, then Eric and Taylor.

I waited expectantly for Melissa to walk in.

She didn't.

"Where's Mel?"

"She wouldn't come," Nathan said after a was silence.

Then Daley said, "So, how you feeling?"

"I'm okay."

"Are you?" Eric said. "I heard that you were delusional this morning."

Nathan glared at him.

Eric quickly shut up.

There was more silence, so I broke it this time. "So, how have you guys been? What'd I miss?"

"Nothing much," Daley said.

"Except I just got this fabulous pair of shoes yesterday," Taylor said, modeling her shoes.

Everyone rolled their eyes.

I chuckled.

"What? You don't like them?"

"They're beautiful, Taylor," I said.

She smiled.

Her shoes were gold and sparkly, shining in the light.

"Alright. Well, we're glad that you're okay," Daley said. "But we gotta go."

"Great. I'm starving," Eric said.

"That's not new," said Daley.

Everyone bade their goodbyes and left me to my thoughts.

Why didn't Melissa come? Is she mad? Is she on a date with Moe? "I'm done with you!" Is she really done with me. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson...if you want me to be." No, she couldn't be done with me. She was just mad at me earlier. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson...if you want me to be."


	6. In Reality's Nightmares

Billy slammed me against the wall.

I looked over his shoulder, to the bunk bed.

Melissa and Moe sat, watching me, enjoying this. His arm was wrapped around Melissa's waist. Every now and then, he'd kiss her...and she'd kiss him back.

I was slammed against the wall again. "Melissa, help me!"

She didn't, just kept watching with a smile on her grabbed my shirt, lifting me into the air, then slung me to the floor behind him.

I looked up at him, then at Melissa, my eyes pleading.

She stared back at me. Her smile grew wider.

Billy picked me up by my foot with great strength.

I dangled upside down for a moment before he dropped me.

He got on top of me punching.

"Stop!" I yelled. "You're hurting me!"

He pulled me to my feet.

Melissa got up from her spot on the bed, walking over to us.

Billy let go of me.

"Thank you, Melissa," I said.

All of a sudden, Melissa grabbed my shirt with incredible strength, slinging me to the ground.

I turned over to look at her, shock on my face. "What did you do that for?"

She kicked me in my lower stomach.

I yelled, squeezing my eyes together, my head tilted backwards in pain.

Her kicks hurt worse that Billy's. She began kicking my side, each blow growing harder and harder, earning a yelp from me. She jumped on top of me, a shiny silver object in her hand. She lifted it into the air.

"Melissa, wait." I held up a hand. Her arm flies downward, knife in hand.

* * *

I stood by the bunk bed at the far end of the room.

Melissa slid the metal bars shut, locking them behind her. She walked up to me, unexpectedly kissing me.

I kissed back. One of my hands held onto the bar of the bunk bed, the other brushing Melissa's cheek. I heard a click.

Melissa looked at me, smiling.

I turned around to see one of my hands cuffed to the bunk bed. "Melissa..."

She pulled something out of her pocket.

"Mel, please don't do this."

She lit the match.

"Mel! Stop!"

Her hand hovered above the bunk.

"Don't do this, Mel. Please!" I yelled at her.

She didn't move.

"D***it, Mel! Why are you doing this to me?!"

She let go of the match.

It seemed to take an eternity, everything in slow motion.

"No!!!!"

It landed on the bed, which ignited into a huge fire.

Melissa brushed my cheek with her lips softly. Then she placed a small key on the ground, just out of my reach. Melissa walked to the bars.

"Mel! Mel, don't leave me here!" I was trying to break the handcuffs, to no avail. I then tried to reach the key, but failed, centimeters from it.

Melissa slid open the cell door, shutting it and locking it behind her.

"Mel! You can't do this to me!" I yanked the cuffs, then turned to Melissa.

She blew me a kiss, then walked down the hall, out of sight.

My hand started burning. "Oh, s***! S***, Mel!" I yelled. "Mel! Mel!"

* * *

I woke up on the island, laying on a long dock that I hadn't seen before.

It went out far into the ocean.

I looked around. No one was in sight. Then I looked to the ocean, seeing a boat.

Melissa was on it, about to drop the anchor.

She noticed I was looking at her and smiled.

I smiled back. I noticed the anchor wasn't attached to anything on the boat. I followed the chain, beginning at the anchor. I saw it at the other end of the dock, leading to...my ankle. "No, Mel, don't do it!"

But it was too late.

She dropped the anchor.

The chain yanked my foot, dragging me down the dock.

I looked back to the beach.

No one was there to help me.

I reached out for something to grab, but there was nothing. I started clawing at the dock, but I wasn't slowing down. As I slid down the wooden dock, splinters stuck my body.

I looked back, taking a deep breath, the end inches away.

* * *

Billy threw me on the hood of a blood red Mustang.

I rested there for a second, just missing a small silver statue-like piece of metal, shaped like an anchor, sticking out on the hood.

Then I was yanked to the ground by my ankles. I was being kicked...everywhere. I could see Billy, Moe, Nathan, and Taylor, her gold shoes sparkling.

Taylor spat in my face.

Then I saw Mr. Rosenthal, Daley, Abby, and Big Jay, all kicking and punching me. I looked past them to see Eric, Ian, Jory, and Captain Russell, watching.

Billy picked me up, slamming me against the hood, then throwing me on top of it, punching.

I tried to grow smaller with every punch, the anchor stabbing into my back. I pushed and kicked, but I couldn't get free.

Eric, Ian, Jory, and Captain Russell walked over to me and held me down, pushing me into the anchor even more.

I yelped.

Suddenly , everyone stopped, letting me go.

I slid down the front of the car, falling to the ground.

The car's headlights came on.

I turned my body slowly to see Melissa at the wheel. I just sat there, directly facing her, breathing heavily.

The car revved up. She pressed the pedal a bit, the car coming closer.

I started backing up on my elbows.

She pressed the pedal some more.

I put my feet onto the front of the car for defense, helping me to move faster. "Wait! Are you crazy?!" I yelled.

She didn't slow down.

"Stop! Mel, stop!"

The car stopped, the headlights off.

I kept backing up, wanting to get well away from it. Then I hit a streetlight, one that was very familiar. Once I backed into the pole, I heard a click.

Nathan put handcuffs on me.

"What? No! I thought you were my friend!" I said.

The headlights on the car turned back on.

I had a bad feeling about this."Nathan, please. You gotta let me go."

He moved to stand next to the others.

"No! Don't do this!" I was shaking my head, car rolled slowly toward me. I sat there, hands behind my back, legs bent. Trying to hide tears, I hid my head in my knees.

I looked back up.

The Mustang was gaining speed.

I back up as far as I could against the pole, trying to get the cuffs off.

The streetlight flickered above me.

"Please! Stop! I can't take this! I don't wanna die now! Nathan! Please! Tell her to stop!"

The car came, faster and faster. It was a couple feet away.

I squeezed my eyes shut tight. After a few seconds, I opened them, wondering if I was dead. I wasn't.

I didn't see the car, so I turned around.

It was turning onto another street.

I sighed shakily, trembling. I relaxed a little, then looked up, whispering to myself. "Thank you. Thank you." I rested my head in my about a minute, I looked up.

The Mustang raced toward me, silver anchor glistening only, a couple feet away.

* * *

"Ahhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!"

"What? What is it?" Nathan bust the door open, rushing in.

"Leave me alone! You lied to me! Stay away from me!"

He hustled toward me, trying to calm me down. "Hey, everything's okay. I'm not gonna hurt you."

"Bull****!" I tried to get out of bed.

Nathan held me down.

"Get off me! Let me go! I'm getting the f*** outta here!" I said, trying to push him off.

"No! You're staying right here!"

"F*** you, Nathan! F*** you!"

Nelson came rushing in as I punched Nathan in the face. "What is it?" Nelson said. "What's wrong?"

I got out of bed, managing to push past Nelson and run out the door. I hurried down the hall, searching for a way out. Finding a staircase, I started to run down it, but tripped and fell down the stairs. I banged against a wall at the bottom, reminding me of Billy. I crawled, pushing myself to a standing position.

I never stopped running. I could hear Nathan calling after me, his footsteps coming down the stairs quickly. I found the back door and opened it.

It only opened a couple of inches before it caught on the chain.

"S***!"

"Jackson!" Nathan was behind me.

I took off running through the house.

"Jackson, wait!"

I ran through the living room, hoping I'd come across the front door or the kitchen, so I could grab a knife.

I kept running. "D***, Nathan! Why's your house so f***ing big?!" I yelled behind me.

I found the kitchen, going around the counter, looking in drawers, throwing everything onto the floor. "S***! C'mon. C'mon. Where the f*** are they?!"

"You talking about this?" It was Nathan's voice.

I slowly looked at him.

He held up a silver blade: A butcher's knife. He stepped toward me.

I gulped. "Don't you dare come near me, you son of a b***, or I'll f***ing-"

"Jackson, I'm not gonna hurt you."

"You're d*** right, you ain't" I jumped at him, grabbing the knife, trying to run away.

He wouldn't let go of me, trying to get the knife back.

"Let go of me, d***it!"

Nelson stepped into the kitchen.

I had to get out of there.

Two against one wasn't going to work out too great for me.

I gripped the knife tight in my hand and stuck it in Nathan's stomach, in a spot that I knew wouldn't kill him. I couldn't kill Nathan, and I knew it.

Nathan fell to the floor, clutching his stomach.

Nelson ran to him, screaming. "Nathan! Nathan!"

I stood there for a second, realizing what I'd done. But I couldn't stay here anymore. I wasn't welcome.

I looked around, panicking. I saw the front door next to the refrigerator. "There it is," I mumbled to myself.

I opened it. I ran outside, knife in hand, not knowing where I was going. I stepped onto the street and looked up it, wondering where I was and which way I should go.

A car horn honked behind me, breaks slamming.

I turned to see a blood red Mustang with a small silver anchor statue on the hood.

Melissa was at the wheel, lighting a match, a cigarette dangling from her mouth.

Startled, I fell to the ground.

The car was a couple feet from me.

The last thing I saw was a lone streetlight, it's bulb flickering, and sparkling gold shoes running toward me.


	7. Heartbeat In The Machine

"Jackson? Jackson?" It was Melissa.

I opened my eyes.

I lay in a hospital bed, a breathing machine next to me because I was on life support.

"Oh, I'm so glad you're okay!" Melissa said, hugging me and kissing my cheek.

There was a long silence, before I broke it. "Look, Mel. I'm really, really sorry about blowing you off a couple nights ago. I know I hurt you. I know I'm an a**. But I don't mean to be. Honest. It's just...I wasn't thinking. I was stupid. I know. And I know that you are better off without me...but...but I need you." I looked into her eyes. "I love you, Mel." I sighed, finally getting all that off my chest.

"It's okay, Jackson. I forgive you." She kissed me again, this time on my lips.

I kissed back.

The kiss quickly became hotter, more passionate.

I put my hands on her waste, her hands running through my hair.

She rolled on top on me. Then she stopped kissing, turning her head to the breathing machine, her lips still on mine.

I knew what she was thinking. "Mel...no..."

She reached out and unplugged it.

"Mel...please..." I said, barely audible.

She continued kissing me. "I love you, Cody Jackson."

A single tear escaped my eye.

* * *

I woke up to an annoying beeping noise.

I went to rub my eyes and saw I had a hospital armband on my wrist.

What happened to me?

I examined my body: a tube running through my nose, an IV in my hand, cuts and bruises, a cast on my arm.

The events of last night came to me in a blur: the knife, the blood red Mustang, the anchor, the match, and the gold shoes.

A nurse walked in the room, moving to the machines beside me, checking them.

I decided to ask her about what happened. "What happened to me?" I could tell that the nurse was deciding on how much to tell me.

"You were hit by a car."

Suddenly, I remembered. I'd stabbed Nathan and ran into the middle of the street. I'm so stupid. "Is Nathan okay?"

The nurse looked at me, realizing that I remember what had happened. "Yeah, he'll be alright. Any deeper, though, and we could have had a serious problem on our hands."

I looked down guiltily.

All I had to do was cut him a little. He would've let go. I don't know why I did a full-on stab. Did I mention how stupid I was?

Then I remembered something, my head jerking up. "What about Melissa?"

"She's okay. Just a few scrapes and bruises. That's all. She was released this morning. She came by here."

"She did?" I was surprised.

"Uh-huh."

"Do you know what she wanted?"

"No. She just asked if she could see you. I told her that you were asleep, and she said that was perfect."

"So, um...when can I leave?"

The nurse looked at me like I was stupid.

Old news, bro.

But then she saw that I was serious. "You'll have to stay here for at least two days. We need to run some tests and check everything."

I sighed.

I always seem to be locked in a cage somewhere: on the island, in jail, at Nathan's, in the hospital...in my dreams. But lucky for me, I broke free of Nathan's place. Yeah, lucky me. Look where it got me: caged...again. I guess I, Cody Jackson, was never meant to be a free man.


	8. I Dream Of Murder

It's been one week since that day.

And here I sit, once again, on the top bunk, wondering what I did to deserve this. I couldn't help it if I'd thought Nathan was trying to kill me. I was scared. I wanted to be free.

*FLASHBACK*

"Cody Jackson, you're free to go," the doctor said, walking in the room.

I got out of the bed, already in my clothes. I couldn't wait to get outside of these walls. I wanted out of these cages I kept getting sucked into. So here was my chance.

I went down the elevator and past the lobby.

Freedom was just a few feet away.

I walked to the door, about to step out when I heard my name.

"Cody Jackson?"

I turned around to face a police officer, much taller than me.

"Uh...nope. Sorry. Wrong guy."

"Nice try, kid." He stretched out an arm, reaching for me.

I did the only thing I could think of.

I ran.

"Hey, get back here!" The officer ran after me, saying something into his walkie-talkie.

I turned a corner.

Car breaks screeched.

I stopped running.

Everything was quiet.

I was shocked. "Melissa?"

Before she could respond, the officer came up behind me. He threw me on the hood of Melissa's car, cuffing my hands behind my back.

Time seemed to slow down.

I looked at Melissa, her expression pained, turning into hatred.

She knew what I'd done to Nathan.

The officer yanked me off the hood of her car and led me to his.

I could feel Melissa's eyes watching me with an expression of satisfaction.

The officer opened the back door. He knocked my head against the roof of the police car before shoving me inside.

I was, once again, caged.

*END FLASHBACK*

Billy stepped into the cell, back from having another visitor. "Well, well, well. What do we got here? Back so soon?"

I was done putting up with his s***. I was done with begging and crying. I was done with being scared. That never did anything for me anyway, except for make me go crazy and stab a friend. That never got me anywhere, except for jail and the hospital. I was done.

I stared at the ground, wondering if this was how Melissa felt when she'd said she was done with me. I don't blame her anymore. I don't like myself much, either.

"What'd you do this time?"

I didn't reply, just continued to stare at the floor.

"Answer me!"

I didn't.

He came at me.

I kicked him hard in the face when he was close enough.

He fell to the floor.

I jumped on top of him and slammed my fist into his face.

The power felt good. I was in control this time.

I continued punching and kneeing him. My muscles tensed, nostrils flaring. I didn't stop, taking all my anger out on him.

After a couple of minutes, I got tired. It wasn't until then that I noticed he wasn't moving. I stopped punching and stood up, staring at him. I wanted him to hurt. I was satisfied.

Is this how Melissa felt when I got arrested in front of her?

I turned to go to the bed.

My hand was only inches away from grabbing the ladder to climb up when Billy grabbed my ankle.

I fell to the floor, hitting my chin on the started to drag me across the floor.

I turned onto my back and kicked him.

He let go, stumbling back, and I came to a stop. I jumped to my feet, then kicked his side, over and over again.

I wanted to pay him back for all the pain he'd caused me. It was his fault I became crazy. It was his fault that Nathan was in the hospital. It was his fault Melissa hated me. It was his fault that I hurt like this. I hated him. I wanted him dead.

All of a sudden, I stopped. I stood up, rubbing my hands through my hair.

What am I doing? This isn't me. Or was it? Who is Cody Jackson? Who am I?

* * *

I jumped off the top bunk.

Billy was still in the floor.

I knew I had to apologize.

It wasn't his fault. It was mine. And I knew that now.

I sighed.

I knew what he would do after I wake him up. And I knew he'd have it in for me.

But I told myself at the hospital that I would make the right decisions, and, so far, I wasn't doing too hot of a job at that. I would just have to suck it up. I can take it.

I walked over to him and lightly kicked his foot.

He didn't wake up.

I kicked harder.

Still nothing.

"Billy? Billy, wake up."

There was no answer.

I bent down and lightly slapped his cheek. "Billy? C'mon, Billy, wake up. Billy?! C'mon. Stop playing, man! I'm serious! Wake up!"

Billy still didn't move.

"Billy?!" I yelled.

I got up, my hands on top of my head, pacing.

What have I done? I'm a murderer.

After a moment, I thought about checking for a pulse, just to be sure.

My breathing was shaking. I slowly took my hands off my head, bending down by Billy's body. I took a breath, lowering my head toward him. My hand moved to his neck, feeling for a pulse.

I didn't find one.

"C'mon, Billy! Don't do this to me!" I pounded on him. Bent over, I lay my head on his chest, the tears falling. I grabbed his shirt in my fists. "Billy, wake the f*** up! S***! Please! D***it, Billy!"I let go of him, lifting my head.

I crawled to the corner, shaking madly. With my head in my knees, I rocked back and forth.

* * *

"Billy!" I woke up trembling.

Realizing that it was just a dream, I calmed down a little, slowing my breathing. I looked around.

Billy still lay on the floor.

"S***!" It came out as a whisper, almost inaudible.

I started shaking again. I jumped off the top bunk, landing next to Billy.

"Billy!" I leaned down to check for a pulse.

"Get the f*** off me!" It was Billy.

All of a sudden, a sharp pain went through me.

I stumbled back.

Billy put his arm down after punching me, then quickly jumped on top of me. His knees landed straight onto my elbows, pinning me instantly.

Pain shot through me.

He punched and punched. He didn't have a hand on my shirt this time.

I just lay there, with no way to escape.

He punched, one after another. Unexpectedly, he kicked me in my lower stomach, unable to use his knee.

I let out a yelp.

Stop it, Jackson. You can't show pain! I repeated this in my head.

Since I wasn't begging him to stop like I used to, Billy punched and kicked harder.

It was hard to hide the pain, but I did it. I wondered when he would stop, every blow hurting more than the previous. My vision was growing dark. I fought to keep myself awake, but I couldn't.

I could hear a voice.

"Cody Jackson, you're free to-oh my gosh!" There were a lot of keys jingling together. "Now, which one of these was it?"

"C'mon! Hurry up!" It was Nathan. "Hurry up!"

The keys jingled some more. "Oh, here it is." He took his time to put it in the lock and turn, Nathan yelling at him the whole time. Once the door was opened, the officer rushed in, pulling Billy off me, with the help of Nelson.

"Jackson? Jackson?! C'mon, man, wake up!" Nathan patted my cheek softly. "Jackson, get up!"

I couldn't move, darkness overcoming me.

"Jackson, wake up!" Nathan yelled. He slapped me hard across the face.

My eyes flew open. "N...Nathan?"

Nathan exhaled visibly, relieved.

"What are you doing here?" I spoke in a low voice, gaining my air back gradually.

"I came to get you."

"I thought you...hated me."

"C'mon. I could never hate a friend," he said, smiling.

I tried to smile, but couldn't. It hurt too much. My arms were pounding, mainly at my elbows. My lower stomach was killing me. My nose was bleeding.

Nathan helped me up.

I tried not to show pain. "I thought I was gonna have to stay for at least a year," I said. "How'd you get me out?"

"I asked my dad to pull some strings, and he finally gave in."

"After a lot of crying and begging...and the silent treatment," Nathan's dad said.

Nathan smiled, dropping his head, embarrassed.

"Thanks, man," I said to Nathan. Then I looked up to Nelson. "If there's anything I could do to repay you, Mr. McHugh, just let me know."

"Trust me," he said. "I will."

I heard the officer yelling brutally at Billy.

"Hey, take it easy on him, man. It was my fault." After Nelson eyed me, I quickly added, "Well, most of it, anyway."

Billy looked up, shocked that I'd stuck up for him.

I was kind of shocked, myself.

The officer stopped yelling, leading us out of the cell, locking Billy in by himself.

Billy eyed me until I was out of sight.


	9. Dial Tone Confession

Nelson handed me a list of chores for the week.

After he left the room, I compared with Nathan.

"Seriously? Man, this sucks." My list was almost twice as long as Nathan's.

"Well, good luck, bro." Nathan got up after patting my shoulder, leaving the room.

I looked at the list, then fell back onto the bed with a sigh. I didn't feel like moving. The long list made me tired just thinking about it.

I rested my eyes.

* * *

I looked up, hoping they'd let me go, wanting to see Nathan bringing the key to unlock the handcuffs.

Instead, I saw Melissa standing next to me, inches away.

She held a gun to my head.

"Mel...don't...please," I said, my voice shaking. "Don't do this to me, Mel. Mel, please!"

She didn't move a muscle.

"I-I'm sorry, Mel," I said, my voice cracking. "I didn't mean to. I swear. I can explain."

Melissa cocked the gun.

"Mel, please don't!" I was in tears now. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I'm an ***hole. Please forgive me. I'll do anything. Just, please, let me go. I'll give you whatever you want. Anything."

She moved the gun so it touched my head, showing she didn't care what I had to say.

Everyone watched, waiting.

"S***! Please, Mel!" I yelled at her. "You don't want to do this. I'll do anything. I'll always be there for you from now on. I promise"

"Now, now, Cody Jackson. You shouldn't make promises you can't keep," Melissa spoke up.

I heard a familiar voice in my head. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson...if you want me to be."

"Th-then why did you?" I said without thinking.

"What are you talking about? I haven't broken any promises to anyone."

"On the island, you told me that you'd be here for me."

"Things change, Jackson. People change."

"But you promised!" I was desperate.

"That was a long time ago, Jackson. I don't want to help you anymore."

"Then what the f*** do you want?!" I yelled.

"You...dead." Melissa moved her index finger, about to pull the trigger.

"Wait, wait!"

Melissa paused.

I continued. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for being such an a**. I'm sorry I'm so stupid. I'm sorry I didn't show up. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I'm so f***ed up. And I know I don't deserve you, but you're all I've got. And-I...I love you, Mel."

Melissa pulled the trigger.

* * *

I woke up and looked at the clock. 7:46. I decided to go ahead and get some of my chores done, heading out of the room and closing the door behind me. I walked downstairs, trying to recall where the kitchen was. I found it.

Nelson was almost done cooking dinner. "Food will be ready in a couple minutes. Will you go find Nathan for me?"

"Sure," I said, turning on the heel of my foot to search for Nathan. I walked around the first floor of the house, making sure I remember where everything is for future reference. I didn't see him down here so I headed upstairs. I open all the doors, checking inside.

There was no sign of Nathan.

I came to a room, the door cracked open.

I pushed it, peeking inside.

It was Nathan's room, but he wasn't in it.

I walk in, looking around.

There was a shelf filled with books, a computer in the corner, a TV in front of the bed, and a closet the size of my room at my old house.

I heard a car horn and walked to the window.

Nathan was outside, walking toward a blood red Mustang.

"Melissa," I whispered to myself. I bolted out the door, taking the stairs, two at a time. I slowed down when I came to the kitchen, so Nelson wouldn't think I was trying to run away again. I opened the door and started walking down the driveway.

Melissa was talking to Nathan, both laughing. She looked over Nathan's shoulder, seeing me. "I gotta go, Nathan. I'll see you later," she said in a cold voice.

Nathan tuned around, wondering what was wrong with her. He saw me walking toward them. He was confused at why Melissa wouldn't want to talk to me.

She always did on the island. Melissa put the car in drive, stepping on the pedal.

"Melissa, wait!" I hustled toward her, but she was gone when I reached the end of the driveway. "S***!"

Nathan said, "Is there something going on between you two?"

I looked down the rode, toward where Melissa had driven. "No," I said quietly. "Not anymore."

* * *

I sat at the table, picking at my food with a fork.

I was thinking about Melissa, and why she hated me so much, voices and pictures running through my head. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson...if you want me to be." "I'm done with you!" I thought about the dream I'd had, replaying it in my mind, seeing and feeling every detail.

Melissa pulled the trigger.

I dropped my fork onto the plate, startled.

"Jackson, you okay?" Nathan asked.

"Yeah. I'm fine," I said, resting my head in my hand.

Nelson spoke up. "Elbows off the table."

I removed them. "Can I be excused?"

"I don't know. Can you?"

"May I be excused?" I corrected.

"Yes. Put your plate in the sink."

I got up, placing the dish into the sink, and headed upstairs. I fell onto my bed, exhaling.

Why wouldn't Melissa talk to me anymore?

Maybe I could call her.

I went to the phone sitting on a small table in the hall and dialed her number, then faced the end of the hallway.

After a few rings, she answered. "Hello?" Her voice sounded excited, as if she'd been waiting by the phone for a while.

"Melissa?"

The excitement drained from her voice. "What do you want, Jackson?"

"Melissa, I-" The only sound I heard was the dial tone in my ear. I turned to see Nelson, holding down the hang-up button.

"No phone until your chores are finished." He walked back down the stairs.

I stared after him, until he was out of sight.

"***hole," I mumbled.

"What did you just call me?"

I called down to him. "Nothing."


	10. Gold Found Laughing By The Pool

I looked up, hoping they'd let me go, wanting to see Nathan bringing the key to unlock the handcuffs.

Instead, I saw Melissa standing next to me, inches away.

She held a gun to my head.

"Mel...don't...please," I said, my voice shaking. "Don't do this to me, Mel. Mel, please!"

She didn't move a muscle.

"I-I'm sorry, Mel," I said, my voice cracking. "I didn't mean to. I swear. I can explain."

"I'm listening."

"I was stupid, I know. I didn't mean to hurt you Mel."

"Then why did you?" she snapped.

"I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking straight. Moe was really p***ing me off. I was angry."

Melissa cocked the gun.

"Mel, please don't!" I was in tears now. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry I'm an ***hole. Please forgive me. I'll do anything. Just, please, let me go. I'll give you whatever you want. Anything."

She moved the gun so it touched my head, showing she didn't care what I had to say.

Everyone watched, waiting.

"S***! Please, Mel!" I yelled at her. "You don't want to do this. I'll do anything. I'll always be there for you from now on."

"Now, now, Cody Jackson. You shouldn't make promises you can't keep," Melissa spoke up. "Besides, I don't want that anyways."

"Then what the f*** do you want?!" I yelled.

"You...dead." Melissa moved her index finger, about to pull the trigger.

"Wait, wait!"

Melissa paused.

I continued. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for being such an a**. I'm sorry I'm so stupid. I'm sorry I didn't show up. I'm sorry I hurt you. I'm sorry I'm so f***ed up. And I know I don't deserve you, but you're all I've got. And-I...I love you, Mel."

Melissa pulled the trigger.

* * *

I woke early to get a head start on my chores, so I could call Melissa.

I grabbed the list from the nightstand, then read the first line aloud. "Clean the pool."

I got up and walked down the stairs. I saw Nelson in the kitchen.

"Breakfast is ready. Will you go find Nathan?"

"Yeah, sure."

Great. So much for my early start.

I walked upstairs, checking his room first. I was about to knock on the door, when I heard the TV inside his room.

"...the District Attorney, Nelson McHugh. Cody Jackson, a nineteen year old convict, was released from the Los Angeles Police Department last night. You might remember Cody Jackson from..."

I quickly knocked on the door, not wanting Nathan to hear the rest.

The TV was silent.

"Come in."

I turned the knob, stepping inside. "Breakfast is ready."

"Okay." I turned to leaved.

"Uh, Jackson?"

I stopped in the doorway, my eyes shut. Turning toward him, I opened them, like nothing was wrong. "Yeah?"

Nathan hesitated. The silence seemed to last forever. "Uh...nevermind."

I turned and walked out the door, exhaling visibly.

* * *

I walked out to the pool.

It was green, with leaves and little bugs floating at the top.

Then I realized something. I have no idea how to clean a pool. I'll figure it out. How hard could it be?

I grabbed the pool net, getting out as many bugs and leaves as I could. Every time it seemed like I was done, more would appear.

After a while, I gave up on the net, sitting it down by the edge of the pool.

I found a jug of chlorine in the shed. This is what you use to clean a pool, right? I hope so. I was about to pour it in when I tripped over the pool net, falling into the green pool.

I pushed off with my feet when I hit the bottom, feeling the gooey slime between my toes. My head rose out of the water. Frustrated, I splashed, cursing. "S***!"

I heard laughing. Looking up, I saw Taylor.

Her eyes were watering because she was laughing so hard.

"You think this is funny?" I said, a little mad.

She nodded, unable to speak, still laughing.

I splashed her with water.

She immediately stopped laughing, eyes wide.

I smirked.

"You think this is funny?!" She was furious.

I stopped smiling. "I'm sorry. I…I thought-"

"Jackson, I'm kidding." She broke into a smile.

I sighed with relief.

I hopped out of the pool, soaked from head to toe.

Eric came from around the corner of the house. "Whoa! What happened here?" He began laughing.

"Come here, Eric. I want to give you a hug," I said.

Eric began backing away. I chased him.

When I caught up to him, I tackled him. I stood up, releasing him, all of us laughing, drenched.

We walked upstairs, trying not to get the floor too wet because I knew I'd have to clean it up.

I handed each of them a towel, grabbing one for myself. I took a quick shower, making sure to get the goo off my feet and the bugs out of my hair. I changed clothes, then walked into the bedroom, where Taylor and Eric waited for me.

"Wow!" Taylor said, noticing my scratches and bruises. "You look horrible!"

"Thanks, Taylor. I really appreciate that."

"What happened?!"

"Uh...nothing." I couldn't think of an excuse.

"Doesn't look like nothing," Eric said.

"Yeah, they look pretty bad, Jackson."

"I'm fine, okay?" I said, my voice cold and irritated.

"I know the perfect thing," Taylor said. She dug through her purse, pulling out some type of make-up.

"Oh, no," I said. "I'm not using that."

"It'll cover most of it up," she said.

"I don't care. It won't help the pain." I realized what I had said and looked at her.

She wore a pained expression on her face, sad that I was hurting.

"Taylor, I didn't mean that," I said, my voice softer. "I'm fine, Taylor. Honest." I sat next to her, putting my arm around her to comfort her.

"Yeah. See?" Jealous that I was touching Taylor, Eric purposely punched me hard in the side.

I winced, not expecting that.

"Eric! You hurt him!"

"No, I'm fine. Don't worry bout me. I'll be okay." I looked into her eyes.

Time seemed to slow down.

Suddenly, someone yelled from down the stairs. "Cody! Why is the floor wet?!" It was Nelson.

Eric looked relieved, not wanting anything more to happen between Taylor and me.

We walked down the stairs.

Nelson met us at the bottom. "You know your not supposed to have company until your chores are finished."

"I know."

"We'll see you later, Jackson." Taylor waved goodbye, then followed Eric out the door.

"Get this mess cleaned up," Nelson said.

"I will."

"No. You are!" he corrected me, handing me a mop.

Hesitantly, I grabbed it from him, sighing. "I am."

* * *

Nathan walked in the door. His eyes grew wide when he saw me. "Whoa! Jackson mopping the floor?! That's a first."

I didn't look up, just shook my head, frustrated and annoyed.

"So, what happened in here, anyway? Why is your hair wet?"

"I had a little trouble cleaning the pool."

"What? Did you fall in?" he said sarcastically.

I kept mopping, silent.

"You did, didn't you?!" He laughed.

"It's not funny," I said coldly, thinking about something else.

Nathan could tell I had other things on my mind. "What's up?"

"It doesn't matter." I walked away, putting the mop up, then headed upstairs, dropping onto the bed.


	11. Cut Short Even Shorter

I sat up, then walked downstairs to the kitchen.

Nelson was cooking breakfast. "Jackson, could you-"

"-go find Nathan?" I finished. "I'm on it."

Nathan was outside, getting the mail.

"Breakfast, Nathan," I called out the front door.

Nathan followed me inside.

We walked to the kitchen, grabbed a plate, then took a seat in the dining room.

"So..." Nelson said, starting a conversation. "How many chores do you guys have left?"

"None," Nathan said.

I froze, the fork halfway to my mouth. How does he finish so fast?

"Cody?" Nelson said.

"Uh, I'm almost finished." I continued eating.

* * *

Nelson led me to the garage. "There's the push-mower." He pointed in front of me.

"Why can't I use the riding mower?"

"It's broken."

"I can fix it. I'm really good at-"

"No! That will take up too much time."

I stared at him.

"What are you waiting for? Get to work!"

I sighed, walking to the lawnmower, pushing it outside.

* * *

I wiped the sweat off my head with my arm.

It was really hot outside, the sun beating down on me.

I pushed the mower back into the garage, finished after two hours. I walked in the house, grabbed a bottle of water, and gulped down every last bit in a matter of seconds.

"Finished already?" Nelson said.

"Yeah."

"You did the backyard, too?"

I just looked at him.

"Come here." He stood up, leading me to the back door.

We stepped outside.

I looked out, seeing about four acres of grass, already short.

"Good luck." He patted my shoulder hard.

I stumbled forward a bit.

Nelson disappeared into the house.

"S***!"

* * *

The sky was dark by the time I was finished, stars twinkling up above.

I guided the lawnmower into the garage, then headed inside. I slowly walked up the stairs. I opened the door to my room, slumping onto the bed, too tired to take a shower and change. I fell asleep with my shoes on.


	12. Past In The Boxes

_Chapter Twelve: Old News Isn't A Secret To The District Attorney, Especially If It Made Front Page In The Paper_.

* * *

"Jackson? Jackson, wake up." It was Nathan.

I sat up. "What?"

"My dad wants you."

Great. "Okay."

Nathan left the room.

I just sat there for a moment before getting out of bed.

I walked downstairs and found Nelson in the living room. "I need you to help me rearrange the furniture."

I sighed.

"So, I was thinking about putting the couch over there, and the TV over there. What do you think?"

"I think it looks just fine how it is."

"You would, compared to what your old place looked like," he mumbled.

I glared at him.

He ignored me. "Alright. Let's get stared."

* * *

I set the TV down, legs shaking. "A little help would be great."

"I am helping. I'm choosing where everything goes. That takes a lot of thinking."

I rolled my eyes.

"Hey! Don't roll your eyes at me, young man!"

I didn't say anything.

"You understand?!"

"Yes."

"Yes, what?"

"Yes, I understand."

"Yes, I understand, what?"

"Yes, I understand that I'm not supposed to roll my eyes at you."

"Yes, I understand that I'm not supposed to roll my eyes at you, what?"

"Yes, I understand that I'm not supposed to roll my eyes at you, Mr. McHugh."

"Yes, I understa-"

"Yes, I understand that I'm not supposed to roll my eyes at you, Mr. McHugh, kind sir." I bowed like a prince to the king.

Sitting on the couch, soda in hand, Nathan chuckled, then quickly stopped when Nelson glared at him, continuing to innocently drinking his coke.

"You better watch the attitude, Cody. Get back to work."

"So, is this okay?" I said, looking around the living room.

"Actually, I think it was just fine the way it was before."

* * *

I set the TV in its original spot. "Is it good, now?" I was a little p*** off. It was the forth time we-I mean, I-had moved the furniture around. Now, it looked exactly the way it was when we started.

"Actually-"

"C'mon. Can't you make up your mind?" I was tired, my legs hurting.

"Actually," he continued, "I think it looks great. Not good, but great."

"Thank you." I sighed, relieved.

"Now, to rearrange the basement," Nathan said.

I groaned.

"Dude, I was kidding."

"No, that sounds like a great idea, Nathan. Follow me, Cody." Nelson started walking.

I glared at Nathan. "Great. Thanks."

"Anything for you, kind sir." Nathan imitated my earlier act.

I couldn't help but grin.

"Cody, get down here!" Nelson called.

My smile quickly faded.

I walked to the basement, Nathan following behind me.

There was one light bulb, its chain dangling from the ceiling. Spider webs hung from above. Things were thrown all over the floor. Objects on the shelf were unorganized.

"I need you to dust and sweep, organize things, and move those boxes to that corner."

"Are you sure that that's where you want them?" I said, not wanting to move them back after I was finished.

"Yes. I'm sure."

"I'm gonna stay here and help him," Nathan said.

"No, I, uh, need you to, um...go to the store for me."

"But I went this morning."

"And now you're going again."

Nathan sighed, giving me an apologetic look, then followed his father up the stairs.

I looked around, then glanced at my watch. 10:34 a.m.

I sighed.

If I finished quickly, I would have enough time to call Melissa.

* * *

Everything was dusted and swept. I began to organize the shelves. After that was done, I walked to the boxes.

They were, unexpectedly, light.

Curious, I looked inside.

I found newspaper articles.

I glanced through them, seeing one about a drunk driver that flipped his car, surviving. Unfortunately, his mother didn't.

"Billy..." I said to myself. I folded it up, sticking it into my back pocket to read later.

I was about to close the box when one particular article grabbed my attention. I picked it up, reading it. "S***!" I said.

The article read, "_Cody Jackson accused of rape._"

"He knows..." I realized.

"Yeah. I know."

I whipped around to find Nelson.

"I've known that for a while, now."

I didn't speak.

"Get back to work, Cody Jackson."

"And if I don't...?"

"You don't want me to tell Nathan about this, do you?"

"Tell Nathan about what?" It was a new voice.

I looked over Nelson's shoulder to see Nathan standing there.

Nelson put his arms on my shoulders, squeezing them hard, dragging me in front of him. "Cody has something to tell you."

"What?" Nathan looked at me.

I pulled myself from Nelson's grip, careful not to let Nathan notice. "Uh...I asked Mel out today," I lied.

"Really? What did she say?"

"Yes."

"Congrats, man."

"Well, actually, Cody-"

I threw Nelson a pleading look, silently begging him to go along with it.

"-got a job," Nelson finished his sentence.

"You did?" Nathan said.

"Um...uh-huh."

"Cool."

The telephone rang.

"I'll get that," Nathan walked up the stairs, leaving me alone with Nelson.

After a moment, I said, "Thanks for not telling him." I was looking at the ground.

"Hey, I'm just gonna sit back and watch this blow up in your face. By the way, you start Monday at 8:00."

"Start what?"

"Your job." He started walking toward the stairs. Without stopping, he said, "Oh, and, Cody?"

I looked up.

"Finish cleaning this mess."

"I will."

He stopped in his tracks, back still facing me.

"I am, Mr. McHugh...sir."

He continued walking, leaving me to myself.

I stood there for a moment, then heard Nathan calling me.

"Jackson, phone's for you."

I walked up the basement stairs, wondering who would call me.

Nathan handed me the phone, then went into the kitchen.

"Hello?"

"Jackson?"

"Melissa?"

"I was just calling because you hung up when you were about to explain last time. You wanna meet me somewhere so we can talk?"

"Well, now's not really a good time."

"Oh." She sounded disappointed.

I didn't want to hurt Mel anymore. "Uh, nevermind. I can meet you."

"How about the park?"

"Okay."

"See you at eight."

"See you, Mel."

"Bye, Jackson."

With that, I hung up.

How was I going to get Nelson to let me go?

I walked into the kitchen, holding one arm in the other, nervous. "Uh, Mr. McHugh? Can I go meet Mel at the park tonight?"

I wasn't used to having to ask before I left. When I lived with my mom, I could do whatever I wanted.

"I don't know. Can you?"

"May I go meet Mel at the park tonight?" I corrected.

"Did you finish cleaning the basement?"

I sighed, looking at the floor. My voice was barely above a whisper. "No." I turned to walk back to the basement.

"C'mon, Dad. Let him go. He hasn't left the house since he got here. I'll finish cleaning the basement."

Nelson considered before giving in. "Okay. But be back soon."

"Thanks, Mr. McHugh. Thanks, Nathan." I walked upstairs to change, then sat on the bed, thinking about what I would say to her.


	13. Running From What's Already Happened

The day seemed to go by slowly, so I helped Nathan finish cleaning the basement.

We were silent, neither of us talking for a while. Then, Nathan spoke. "So what time are you supposed to meet Mel?"

"Eight o'clock."

He looked at me. "You do know that that's in five minutes, right?"

I checked my watch. "S***!"

I ran up the stairs.

From the living room, Nelson called to me. "Cody, no running in the house."

I slowed to a walk, going toward the kitchen and out the door. Once outside, I broke into a full-speed run. _______________________________________________________________________

I arrived, finding Melissa sitting on a bench, looking around impatiently. I walked up to her. "Hey, Mel."

"You're late."

Sitting down, I checked my watch. "By two minutes."

I'd made great time, considering it would take the average person twelve minutes to run the distance I did.

"Same old Jackson."

I sighed. "Mel, I'm sorry, okay? I was stupid. I wasn't thinking." I found it hard to stay still. "Uh, you wanna walk?"

"Sure."

We got up, walking through the part of the park that had only one streetlight, where few people went, night or day.

We were silent at first. Then Melissa spoke. "So, why did you stab Nathan?"

I sighed, my hands in my pockets. This was going to be hard to explain. "Mel, I went crazy."

"Yeah, I noticed."

A lone streetlight flickered overhead.

"No. I mean, seriously crazy." I softly grabbed her arm, pulling her to a stop.

In the dim light, she could see the cuts and bruises all over my body. "Oh my-what happened?!" she exclaimed.

"Uh, this happened when I was in jail."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be."

"But it's my fault you were in there."

"No, it isn't, Mel."

"Yeah, it is. I called the police after I hit you."

"But you didn't know that I..." My voice trailed off, not wanting to say the words of what I'd done to Nathan.

We continued walking in silence.

After a long while, I said, "Do you love him?"

Melissa was taken aback by my questioned. She tried to laugh. "What?"

"Do you love him?"

Melissa didn't answer.

I stopped walking, knowing she did, knowing that I'd blown it.

For several seconds, she hadn't noticed that I'd stopped, being caught up in her own thoughts. Then, she turned around, walking to me. "Jackson, what's wrong?"

I sat down on a nearby bench, looking at the ground, my head in my hands, elbows on my knees.

"What is it?" She took a seat beside me.

I looked up at her, tears rolling down my cheeks. "I screwed up, Mel. I didn't mean to. I wasn't trying to hurt you. I know you're really mad."

"Jackson-"

"I know, I know. I'm an ***hole. And I don't deserve you. But you're all I've got, Mel. And...I love you."

"Awww. Jackson's gotta girlfriend."

I turned around to see Moe, followed by five other gang members.

I stood up, the tears no longer falling. "What are you doing here, Moe?"

"I was looking for you. I figured Melissa, here, would eventually lead me to you, so I started going out with her."

"You used me? But we…" Melissa trailed off.

I hoped the farthest they'd made it was to first base, if that.

"You were pretty fun for a while, but you wouldn't go any further than kissing."

I relaxed a bit.

Moe continued. "Jackson's even made it passed first base. In fact, he's made it all the way home."

"Jackson, what's he talking about?"

I didn't answer, my eyes on Moe.

Moe looked at me with fake shock. "You didn't tell her?"

"Leave us alone," I said.

He looked at Melissa. "He didn't tell-"

"Shut up, Moe!" I said.

"I can't believe he didn't tell you what he did."

"What did he do?" Melissa said.

"Mel, don't listen to him. He's full of s***."

"Oh, am I?"

One of the gang members handed Moe a newspaper article.

He handed it to Melissa. "This was from about two and a half years ago, before he went to your rich school and ditched us."

Melissa looked at the headline.

"Mel, I didn't do it. It ain't true."

"The proof is right here. And you're gonna stand there and tell me that it isn't true?"

"I did, but not by force."

"Did you, or didn't you, go to jail for rape?"

"But, Mel, I-"

"Did you, or didn't you, go to jail for rape?"

"Mel-"

"Did you go to jail for rape?!"

I sighed. "Yes, but-"

"That's all I need to know." Melissa left the park in tears after dropping the newspaper in shock.

I just stared after.

"Forget about her, Cody. She wasn't that good at kissing anyways," Moe said with a smirk.

I punched him, jumping on top of him to punch some more.

The other members of the gang rushed over, pulling me off of Moe. They began punching and kicking me all over.

I tried to get free, but couldn't.

They dragged me over to the lone streetlight with the flickering bulb, tightly cuffing my hands behind my back around it, almost cutting off the circulation.

I sat on the ground.

This seemed all too familiar.

They punched and kicked.

I wasn't able to get free. I stayed quiet. I wasn't going to show weakness in front of these guys. When they stopped, I looked down, finding red drops on the ground. My nose was bleeding, and I was coughing up blood. I looked up to see Moe holding his nose, red goo oozing through his fingers.

He walked up to me.

I kicked his lower stomach.

"Hold him, d***it!" he said, doubled up in pain.

The others rushed to me, holding my feet down.

I couldn't wriggle free.

Moe walked up again, this time cautiously. He squatted down, our heads level. He let go of his nose and winded him arm back. While punching with all his might, Moe said, "Sweet dreams, Cody."


	14. Pink Pirates

I woke up, everything a bright white.

Am I dead?

I blinked a little, my vision clearing up. I was at the park.

All the events of last night came rushing to me when I looked down to see the newspaper with dried blood next to it.

"C'mon. C'mon." I tried to get out of the cuffs, to no avail. "S***! D***it!"

"Jackson?"

I looked behind me to see Nathan. "Man, am I glad to see you."

He walked in front of me, squatting down. Unexpectedly, Nathan slapped my face hard.

"What the h*** was that for?!" "Melissa told me what you did. I can't believe you."

"Nathan, I can explain."

"Save it, Jackson. I can't believe you lied to me." With that, he got up and walked away.

"Nathan, wait!"

But he was already gone.

"D***it!" I rested my head on the pole, my eyes closed.

All of a sudden, there was a rustle in the bushes.

"Nathan?"

The bushes stopped moving.

I tensed

A girl of six years stepped out, hair pinned on the top of her head.

I relaxed. "Hey?"

She looked up, surprised, then turned to run.

"Wait! Wait! Don't run."

She looked back at me, her eyes wet, a tear dropping to her pink pirate shirt.

So she likes pirates. Hmm...

"What's wrong?" I said.

"I can't find my dad."

"I wish I could help, but I'm kind of stuck." I showed her the cuffs behind my back, shaking them.

"What did you do?"

"Nothing." I said, "I was walking alone last night and...these pirates came out of no where. They took my money and cuffed me to this pole."

She gasped. "You were out here all night?!"

"Yeah. Um, listen. Can you help me out, here?"

"What do you need?"

I looked around, then at her, searching for something that could get me out of here. "Your hair pin."

She took it out of her hair, walking toward me.

"Okay, I need you to unlock the cuffs. Can you do that?"

"I'll try." She stepped on the newspaper article. "What's that?"

"Uh, nothing" I hoped she didn't know how to read.

She just shrugged. "Okay, so, what do I do?" She was on her knees behind me.

"Just stick the pin in the keyhole and turn it."

She did. "Got it." She dropped the pin to the ground.

I sighed, relieved, slipping my hands out of the cuffs. "Thanks." I rubbed my wrists. They were red.

"So can we go find my dad now."

"Uh, well actually…"

Another tear dripped down her face.

I sighed. "...Yeah. Sure." I looked down as she grabbed my hand, smiling up at me.

I smiled back. I didn't pull away because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.

We were about to start walking when we heard a voice.

"Samantha! I've been looking all over for you!" It was her father.

The girl ran to him.

He pulled her into his arms, holding her tight. He looked at me, then at the ground, around my feet.

I looked down toward where he was looking.

S***!

He saw the newspaper article and the handcuffs. He then set his daughter down slowly, walking toward me.

Realizing what he thought, I spoke up. "It's not what it looks like."

Ignoring me, he punched me in the face.

* * *

I woke up, still sitting in the park.

I tried to stand up, but the cuffs pulled me back down. "S***!"

One cuff was on my wrist, almost as tight as before. The other end was connected to the pole.

I tried to shake free, but couldn't. "D***it!" I leaned my head against the pole, giving up, then hammered the ground with my fist.

My knuckles began to bleed. I turned a bit, repositioning myself, putting my back against the pole, my head still leaning against it. My left hand was behind my back, cuffed to the pole. My other hand lay on top of my bent knees, knuckles still bleeding.

I sighed, then remembered something. "The pin. Where's the pin?" I looked around, finding it behind me. I couldn't reach it from my position, so I moved to it, picking it up. I stuck it into the lock and twisted.

"Yes! S***!" I removed the cuffs and stood, relieved.

I stared at the newspaper, then picked it up, crumbling it. I walked out of the park, throwing the paper in the first garbage can I could find.

No matter where I went, I couldn't seem to run from my past.


	15. The Young And The Homeless

I walked down the street slowly, my hands in my pockets.

Very few people were out at night.

I crossed the empty street, thinking to myself.

I hated being trapped. That's why I was walking. I felt free.

I approached an animal shelter and looked through the glass. The lights were turned off, the shelter closed.

I saw some animals locked in cages, broken. I knew the feeling.

Before I knew what I was doing, I walked around the back of the shelter and kicked the door in.

An alarm went off.

Quickly, I began unlocking the cages.

Animals were everywhere. There were dogs, cats, birds, hamsters, rabbits, snakes, and a lot more.

I came to the last cage.

An old black labrador lay inside. The face was familiar.

I paused in front of the cage for what seemed like an eternity.

*FLASHBACK*

"Daddy, can I get it?" I pointed to the small black puppy.

"We can't take care of it."

"I can."

"Cody, you're three years old. You can't take care of that thing."

"Pwease."

"I said no."

"But, Daddy-"

"Go sit your a** in the car unless you want a beating when we get home!"

*END FLASHBACK*

It had been abused...just like me.

I heard sirens in the distance, snapping me out of my thoughts.

I opened the cage.

The dog didn't move.

"C'mon. Get out."

It still lay in the corner of its cage.

The sirens were approaching.

"C'mon. Let's go!" I whistled, trying everything I could think of. "Here, boy."

He didn't move.

I looked up.

All the other animals were gone, already out the door.

I looked outside.

Cop cars screeched to a stop in front of the shelter.

"S***!" I turned back to the dog. "C'mon! We gotta go!" Tears filled my eyes. I wasn't leaving without him. I begged. "Please."

The dog's head lifted from its arm. He stared at me for a moment. The labrador remembered me. He bolted out the door.

I followed him, only to be pulled back by a police officer. I tried to get away, but couldn't.

The officer had a tight grip on me.

All of a sudden, the black lab leaped through the doorway, biting the officer. It didn't stop.

The policeman let go of me. He tried to get the dog off of him. He gave up, pulling the gun from his side.

I yelled. "Don't! It's just a dog!"

His finger moved to the trigger.

I kicked the gun out of his hands.

The officer slapped the dog across its face.

The lab was slung across the room.

I punched the officer, who fell backward to the floor. I heard a gunshot, then the yelp of a dog. I turned to the labrador.

He had a gun wound in his side.

"No!" I ran to him. "C'mon. C'mon, buddy. Stay with me."

Its breathing slowed gradually, eyes becoming droopy.

I rubbed the back of its neck roughly, my fingers intertwined in its fur.

It looked at me, which seemed to last an eternity. Its eyes slowly shut. His stomach lay still.

"S***! Don't do this to me! C'mon! D***it!" I lay my head on the lab's side, staring at the wound, tears escaping my eyes.

I heard more sirens outside. I glanced out the window before looking back at the dog. "Thank you," I whispered. Unable to say more, I ran out the back door in a flash.

I kept running. I didn't stop. I didn't look back.

* * *

I ran to Nathan's, jumping up onto the porch. I turned the knob.

The door didn't open.

I twisted it some more.

The door still didn't budge.

I knocked.

There was no answer.

I heard a window open from above me. I stepped off the porch and looked up. "Open the door."

"No."

I constantly glanced back, checking for any sign of police coming after me. "Nathan, open the d*** door!"

"No."

"Open the f***ing door, Nathan!"

He left the window, then returned, throwing my clothes out.

"Nathan, what the f*** are you doing?"

"You're moving out."

"Is this because of the newspaper article?"

"Some of it. Jackson, you lied to me!"

"I'm sorry!"

"No, you're not," Nathan said. "Just get out of here!"

Looking down, I was silent for moment. I turned my head back up to face Nathan, meeting his eyes. Quietly, I said, "But I have nowhere else to go."

Before Nathan closed the window, he said, "I know."


	16. A Monster Holds The Gun

It's been a week since I'd been kicked out of Nathan's.

I walked slowly down the sidewalk.

People rushed past me, having someplace to go.

I'd always hated being caged. I'd always wanted to be able to do whatever I felt like. I'd wanted to be in control of my life. I'd wanted to be free.

But now that I was, I didn't want it anymore.

I didn't know what I'd had back at Nathan's.

And now, I couldn't go back.

I was so young...so hopeless. I only get one shot at life, and so far, I was doing a great job at f***ing it up.

I walked past a hair salon. A picture on the TV hanging in the corner of the waiting room grabbed my attention.

It was a picture of me.

I read the captions at the bottom of the screen.

"_Police are still looking for Cody Jackson. Last week, he broke into the local animal shelter, letting all the animals go. None have been captured yet...not even Cody Jackson._"

I put the hood of my jacket over my head, and slipped my hands into the pockets. I continued walking down the sidewalk, with nowhere to go.

I stepped into a gas station, walking to the back and into the restroom.

I slowly approached the mirror above the sink.

I removed the hood of my jacket, then grasped the side of the sink, my knuckles white.

I stared at my reflection.

I was unshaven, a week's worth of growth on my face. My hair was unkempt. My eyes had bags under them from lack of sleep.

I looked deep into them. They were troubled...helpless...broken.

A picture of the black lab with the gun wound in its side went through my mind.

I looked away from the mirror, taking a deep breath.

I turned back, avoiding my own eyes.

I wore a gray hoodie, dirty and ragged. I was skinnier, lacking food.

*FLASHBACK*

I walked down a dark alleyway, looking for shelter, searching for a place to sleep. I carried a garbage bag, only half full. Inside was everything I owned.

Three shadows appeared in the darkness.

I knew what was coming, but I continued walking, getting closer and closer to them with every step I took. I didn't care anymore. I finally reached them.

They walked around me, surrounding me, waiting to attack.

I came to a halt, unable to go anywhere.

They stopped circling me, the biggest guy in front of me.

I kept a steady gaze on him, not showing any sign of weakness.I hadn't noticed the other two creeping closer from behind me until I felt their rough touch, holding my arms back tightly, dragging me to a side of the alley, holding me against the brick wall. I couldn't get free from their grip, so I gave up. What's the point of trying, anyway?

The biggest guy walked up to me, our noses only centimeters away. "What are you doing here? This is our turf."

I stayed silent.

"What are you doing here? Huh?!" He kneed my lower stomach.

I doubled over in pain, dropping the bag.

His knee made contact with my face.

My head flew back, hitting the wall.

I couldn't fight back, my arms pinned to the wall, uneven fingernails digging into my skin. Then I remembered that my legs were free, so I kicked the big guy back, kneeing him, just like he'd done to me, before the other two could stop me.

The big guy stumbled back, holding his face. After taking a moment to recover, he stepped toward me again and began punching.

I couldn't kick, for the two guys pinning my arms also trapped my legs. I tried to get away, but was stuck.

The beating continued for a while.

I was on the ground now.

The big guy was kicking, the other two joining him, no longer having to hold me back.

I tried to shrink into the wall with every kick.

After a while, I began to black out.

They stopped, leaving me there, but taking the bag with my few possessions.

I guess I'd found where I was going to sleep for the night.

*END FLASHBACK*

I took a quivering breath, preparing myself.

I lifted my shirt, revealing a black object sticking out of my pants.

I closed my eyes, taking a few more deep breaths. I hyped myself up.

C'mon, Jackson. You can do this. You have to do this. You need this money.

I pulled the gun from my waistband, holding it tightly, my hand trembling.

I opened my eyes, staring back into them through the mirror.

What am I doing? I'm not a monster. Cody Jackson is not a monster...right?

I tore my eyes from the mirror, turning. I gripped the gun tightly, with confidence now. I was going to do this.

Looking at the black object, the dream I'd had of Melissa shooting me in the head played in my mind.

Melissa pulled the trigger.

Was I really going to take someone's life? For money?

I couldn't.

I had to. I need this.

I, Cody Jackson, was a monster.

* * *

I sat in a parking lot, deep in thought, my head leaning against the pole of a streetlight. My arms were wrapped around my knees.

A car pulled into the parking space beside me.

I looked up to see a blood red Mustang.

Melissa stepped out.

Before I could stop myself, I stood up, removing the hood from my startled Melissa. "Mel..."

"Jackson?! What happened to you?" She looked all over me, examining my body, concerned. Then, she remembered she was mad at me. The care left her voice. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh, just thinking."

"About what?"

*FLASHBACK*

My hand froze when it touched the door handle.

I couldn't do this.

Yes, I could.

I put the hood over my head, then turned the handle quickly before I could change my mind. There was no turning back now.

Before I knew what I was doing, I dropped the gun into a garbage can outside the bathroom, then left the gas station.

*END FLASHBACK*

"Uh, nothing really."

Melissa looked at me, sad. "After all you've done to hurt me, you're gonna stand there and lie to my face...again?"

I sighed. "Mel-"

I was interrupted by a short siren that only lasted a second. I turned around to see a police car.

Inside, the officer that had arrested me at the hospital unbuckled his seatbelt.

It was barely a whisper. "S***!" I started running.

Seeing me, the cop quickly opened the driver's side door, stepping out. He ran after me.

Watching us, a by-stander pushed a shopping cart in front of me.

Without having enough time to react, I crashed into it, falling to the ground. The cart flipped over with me.

Without hesitation, I turned, running, still not fully standing, pushing myself up with my hands.

Before I could break into a full-speed run, the cop tackled me.

We both fell to the ground.

I tried to get away, kicking and punching.

The officer reached to his belt, grabbing a black stick. He started hitting me with it.

I tried to block the blows, but they still came, each one harder than the one before it. I turned onto my stomach, trying to crawl out from under the cop so I could get away. I stretched my arm out in front of me.

Seeing my attempt to escape, the cop grabbed it, bending it behind my back like Billy had during one of my beatings. The officer used his free hand to put the stick back onto his belt and grab a pair of handcuffs.

The side of my face scratched against the concrete as the policeman put the cuffs around my wrists. Then he pulled me to my feet and began pushing me toward his car, reading me my rights.

People cheered all over the parking lot.

I hung my head, unable to look at Melissa. I know I hurt her...again.

The officer opened the door of his car. He purposely slammed my head against the roof before violently shoving me into the backseat.

I was caged again. But this time, I wasn't sure if I was mad that I'd gotten caught, or relieved that I had somewhere to be.


	17. Tangled Faith

I sat in a chair, thinking, surrounded by inmates playing pool, gazing at the almost-broken TV, or chatting.

Police officers were watching everyone closely.

*FLASHBACK*

"Mr. McDonald, has the jury reached a verdict?" the judge said.

"We have, your honor. We find the defendant...guilty."

*END FLASHBACK*

I was sentenced to six years, suspended with five years probation, or I could pay a fine of $8,725, which I didn't have.

I didn't really mind it here. Except for the occasional beatings from another inmate, there weren't any problems.

I sat, staring blankly at the TV. Then I saw a picture of me appear and began listening.

"You may remember Cody Jackson of being falsely accused of rape two years ago. He was also accused of stabbing a man around the same time as the false rape, but found innocent . He seems to not be able to stay out of trouble. Two months ago, he went to jail for participating in an illegal street race. The District Attorney, Nelson McHugh, pulled some strings to get him out. Cody lived with him for about one week before going back to jail for stabbing Nelson's son, Nathan McHugh. Cody Jackson and Nathan McHugh are two of the eleven people that crashed on an island in the South Pacific while going to Palau for a school fieldtrip. They staying on the island for twenty-eight days until rescued. Nelson got Cody out of jail, and he continued to live with them. Now, Cody is back in jail. About a month ago, he broke into an animal shelter, letting all the animals out of their cages for unknown reasons. All the animals escaped except for one: a black labrador. The dog was shot and killed by a police officer. One week after that day, they found and arrested Cody in the parking lot of a local store. He is now in jail, serving six years. The District Attorney didn't get him out this time. Maybe it's time Cody Jackson learned his lesson."

* * *

An officer unlocked the door. "Cody Jackson, you have a visitor."

I looked up. Was I dreaming?

I jumped of the top bunk and walked to the cell door. I stuck my wrists through a small opening.

The policeman put cuffs on them.

I moved my hands back inside the cell.

The officer slid the door open, then led me to a room.

There was a table divided into sections with glass in front of it. Each section had a phone.

The officer removed the cuffs from my hands, then led me to a seat.

I picked up a phone that was next to me, then looked through the glass. I was surprised with who I saw. "Billy?"

"Hey, Cody. Back again? How do you like having a cell to yourself?"

"It's okay. Very quiet without you."

"What's that supposed to mean?" he said, smiling playfully.

I ignored him. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you."

I wasn't rude when I said this, just curious. "Why?"

"'Cause I needed to talk to you."

"About what?"

"That last day in the cell."

"Yeah, I guess I kinda deserved it for what I did the night before that."

"No, not about that. About you sticking up for me. I was shocked."

"Yeah, me, too."

"After all I've done to you, you stuck up for me. So, I wanted to apologize."

"Billy, you don't have to apologize to me."

"But I want to. I took your food and beat you up every day. And you would beg me to stop. But I didn't."

I didn't like talking about being beaten up. I'd never begged liked that before. And I never want to do it again.

"Billy, it's okay. I'm fine."

"And that next time." He looked thoughtful. "That next time, you were changed. You didn't beg. Something happened to you."

I stayed silent, trying to avoid meeting his eyes.

"What was it?"

I finally looked into his eyes.

They were full of concern and curiosity.

I sighed, then began telling him everything that has happened in the past two months.

"I think you need this."

Billy pulled something from his pocket and slid it through a small opening in the glass.

I just stared at it when he removed his hand.

My religion...my faith...it lay right in front of me...but I didn't want it anymore.

"You can keep it, Billy."

"No, Cody. It doesn't belong to me."

"You can have it. I don't want it anymore."

"Cody, you need this."

"No, I don't."

"Listen to me. When I took this, I found God. And, now, He's the most important thing in my life. I had faith. And when I stole this, I took your's."

"It's okay, Billy."

"No, it's not. Cody…" He paused, searching for the right words. "Cody...Cody...Cody..."I was silent."Don't you think you need a little faith right now? After all the bad things that have happened to you? After all the bad things you've done? All the horrible mistakes you've made?"

I hung my head, guilty.

"Cody? Cody, look at me."

I didn't.

"Cody!" He banged on the glass with his fist. "Cody, look at me!" he commanded.

I slowly lifted my head, my eyes filled with tears that wouldn't fall.

"Cody, it's okay to cry. You don't have to hold the tears back."

"I'm not."

"I see them in your eyes. Don't lie to me, Cody."

"I'm not."

"Then let the tears fall."

"I can't. They won't"

Billy looked worried. "Cody, will you do me a favor?"

"What?"

"Take the necklace. And wear it. Don't take it off. When you need help...just pray. Can you do that for me?"

I didn't want it anymore. It was just another thing to loose. But I didn't want Billy to start yelling at me.

An officer came over to us. "Time's up guys."

"Yeah," I whispered to Billy.

"You promise?"

I sighed. "Billy, I don't want-" I hit the floor, my chair flipping over. I looked up to see a police officer.

"Didn't you hear me say, 'Time's up?'"

I didn't answer.

"C'mon! Get up! Let's go!" He lifted the chair to its right position, then grabbed me and began dragging me back to the cell.

I couldn't let Billy down. I had to get the necklace. I had to get my faith back.

I looked behind me.

The necklace was too far for me to grab.

I tried to wriggle free from the officer's grip, but couldn't. I did the only thing I could think of.

I punched him.

He let me go.

I fell backwards. I pulled myself up into the chair and reached for the necklace, but it was gone. I searched around frantically.

Billy knocked on the glass.

I looked up at him.

He slipped his hand into the opening. The necklace was in it.

I started to grab it but fell to the ground when the officer pulled me by the back of my shirt, choking me.

He started to put cuffs on my wrists, but I kicked him.

I reached my arm up onto the table, pulling myself up.

The necklace was still in Billy's hand. I took it.

Billy closed his hand around mine.

I looked into his eyes.

His expression was sad.

The cop started pulling my ankle.

I looked toward him, then back at Billy.

He was saying something, but I couldn't hear him.

"What? I can't hear you?" I yelled to him, loud enough so he could hear.

"Cody, do you promise?"

"Yes. Yes, I promise."

The officer tugged my ankle hard.

My grip on Billy's hand loosened. I looked into his eyes.

The policeman grabbed my other ankle, yanking both of them.

My hand slipped, and I hit the floor. I heard Billy yell.

"Cody!"

The officer grabbed my wrists, tightly cuffing my hands behind my back. He stood, kicked my side, then pulled me up by the chain of the cuffs.

Pain shot through my arms as they were pulled behind me. When I was on my feet, I looked back at Billy, but he was gone.

The cop yanked me violently all the way back to the cell. He unlocked it, then pushed me hard onto the ground.

I fell on my hands, still behind my back.

The cop looked at me. "Get up."

I pushed myself to my feet and walked over to him.

He grabbed my arm, pushing me into the wall. He stepped into the cell, thrusting me against the wall harder. Then, he held my arm tightly, unlocking the handcuffs. When he was done, he grabbed me by the back of my shirt and slung me to the ground. The officer kicked me in the side with his boot a couple of times before exiting the cell, locking the door behind him.

I sat up, opening my hand. Tangled inside lay my faith.


	18. Six Years Without Six Visitors

I lay on the bed, fingering the cross around my neck. I didn't want to break my promise that I made with Billy yesterday, but I didn't want religion. I didn't want to loose it after I started caring about it.

I did what Billy told me to...what Big Jay told me to.

I prayed.

When I was done, I just lay there.

After a moment, I heard footsteps coming down the hall. Then I heard a voice.

"Cody Jackson, you have a visitor."

"That was fast," I mumbled to myself as my prayer worked. I looked up, seeing the same officer from last night, then carefully slid off the top bunk, my side badly bruised. I walked to the bars, putting my hands through the opening, waiting as he put on the handcuffs. When he did, I put my arms back inside the cell as he opened the door.

I wondered if Billy came back to make sure I was okay, to ask if I'd cried, to check if I'd prayed.

The officer led me down a hall.

This wasn't the way to the visiting room.

We approached a door.

He opened it.

I looked inside. There were a couple tables and benches. Policemen watched inmates talking to there families.

Then I saw them. Standing at a table were Nathan, Daley, Lex, Taylor, Eric, and...Melissa.

S***! Why were they here? I didn't want them seeing me like this.

Telling me that he wasn't going to remove the cuffs after what had happened yesterday, the officer pushed me forward.

I stumbled a bit, then walked over to the table where Melissa was.

"Jackson, I'm so glad to see you!" Melissa jumped toward me, tightly wrapping her arms around me, squeezing.

I quickly pulled back.

"Jackson, are you okay?"

"Yeah. My side's a little sore. That's all."

Melissa hugged me lightly.

I still winced, even at her soft touch. I was torn that I couldn't hug her back. My side hurt too much, and my hands were in cuffs.

She stepped back, eyeing me, suspicious. After a moment, she reached to my shirt, wanting to see my side.

"Mel, don't." I stepped back.

She kept coming at me.

I continued backing away until I ran into the corner. "Mel, stop. Don't. I-"

"Oh my gosh!" Melissa exclaimed after pulling my shirt up.

My whole side was a mixture of black, blue, and purple.

"Eww!" Taylor cried.

Nathan stepped closer to get a better look, followed by Daley and Lex.

Taylor ran to the other side of the room. "Eric, the black stuff spread to his side! I gotta get outta here before I catch it! I don't want to end up looking like Jackson!"

Eric laughed, remembering the day he and Taylor saw me doing community service.

"Jackson, what happened?" Nathan said.

I looked over his shoulder to the officer watching me.

The cop smiled.

"Nothing," I said.

Eric said, "Sure doesn't look like nothing."

"Well, it is!" I snapped, then sighed. In a quieter voice, I said, "Look. I'll be okay. Honest."

Everyone eyed me, not sure, then decided to stop talking about it.

Melissa softly put my shirt back down.

I squeezed my eyes shut.

Everyone sat at the table.

"Taylor," Eric called. "That was just a joke. You can't really catch anything from him."

I could tell Eric immediately regretted saying that.

He wanted Taylor for himself. He knew Taylor liked me when we were back on the island.

Taylor came over to the table cautiously and sat.

I pushed myself out of the corner, walking to the table. I slowly sat, biting my lip to keep from yelling out.

Evryone noticed this, but said nothing.

"So," Daley said, looking around at other inmates hugging their families and friends. "Why are you still wearing handcuffs?"

"Uh, I kinda got into some trouble yesterday when Billy came to visit me."

"Billy? That guy you told me beat you up?" Nathan said.

Eric looked at me incredulously. "Jackson got beat up?"

I stared at Nathan, warning him.

"My bad, Jackson. I forgot." Nathan said. "What did Billy want?"

"Just to talk."

"About what?"

"He apologized."

"You didn't forgive him, did you?"

I was silent.

"You did! How could you forgive him after what he's done to you?! He beat you up every day, took you food, had you begging and cry-"

"Nathan!" I said.

"Whoa! Jackson was crying?!" Eric said. "And begging?! I wish I could've seen that!"

I glared at him, and he immediately shut up. "Look, Nathan. I'm not mad at him. Especially not after what I did the night before you got me out."

"What'd you do?" Eric said.

I didn't answer him. "So what are you guys doing here? I thought you were mad at me."

"Well, we were watching TV and we saw you on the news. It said that you were falsely accused of rape," Melissa said. "I'm sorry I didn't listen to you."

"Yeah. Me, too," Nathan said. "And about leaving you in the park."

"It's okay. I understand why you did it."

"Time's up." The officer smirked.

I stood up as quick as I could and began walking toward him.

Melissa grabbed my arm.

I turned to face her.

She wrapped her arms around me, slowly and softly.

I couldn't help but wince.

All of a sudden, the policeman pulled me back by my shirt.

I fell to the ground with a yelp.

"Didn't we talk about this yesterday, Cody? When I say, 'Time's up,' I mean get off your a** and move. I think I'll have to teach you another lesson when we get back to your cell." He kicked my side.

I yelled.

"Since I'm feeling generous, I'll give you a second to give your girlfriend, here, a goodbye-for-six-years hug, because you won't be able to get anymore visitors since you don't come when I say, 'Time's up.'" The officer took out a key and unlocked my handcuffs.

My wrists were pink. I rubbed them for a moment before looking at Melissa.

She was sobbing.

"Mel, don't cry."

"This was all my fault. I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"Mel, it's okay. I'll be okay. I promise." I wrapped my arms around her, despite the pain I was in.

She wrapped her arms around me.

I flinched slightly.

When we pulled apart, I looked into her eyes, and she looked into mine.

We moved closer to each other for a kiss.

My lips were centimeters from hers. I could feel her warm breath.

Our lips were just about to brush together when I was yanked back. I fell to the ground, yelling.

"Let's go!" The officer tugged on the back of my shirt, pulling me to my feet.

I yelped.

He threw me against the wall, snatching my hands behind me, earning another yell from me. He forced my face into the wall as he tightly cuffed my hands, pinching the skin. He yanked me away, and we turned to leave. He called over his shoulders to the others. "Say goodbye to Cody, kids. You won't be seeing him for a very long time."

Everyone was silent. Even Eric didn't have a remark.

The officer pushed me toward the door.

I stumbled, wincing.

The last voice that I heard before walking uneasily back to my cell belonged to Taylor. "Who the heck is Cody?"


	19. Pain Of The Abused

I stood, leaning against the wall, doubled up, coughing up blood. My nose was bleeding. Both of my eyes were black. My lips were swollen, busted. My hair was a mess. My head was pounding. My face and back were scratched and stinging from being thrown against the wall. My stomach cramped from being repeatedly punched. My arm ached from being forced against my back. My wrists were numb because the handcuffs had been so tight they'd cut off the circulation. My ankles hurt from being dragged across the room. My body was covered with bruises, cuts, and scrapes from where he'd kicked with his boots, punched, and beat me with the black stick from his belt. My throat burned from screaming so much.

But no one heard my cries...or cared to stop the officer.

I was abused.

*FLASHBACK*

My dad sat at the kitchen table, drinking a beer. The bottle empty, he threw it in the sink, where the pile of bottles and cans lay.

"Can I get a dog one day?" I asked. I really wanted one.

My dad unsteadily walked toward me. "You've been talking about that d*** dog all f***ing day! I think it's about time you shut the f*** up!" His speech was slurred. He slapped me hard on the cheek with the back of his hand.

I fell backwards, then looked up at him.

He smirked, laughing, his eyes dancing. He grabbed my shirt in his fists, lifting me up. He slammed me against a wall, then slung me to the floor.

Tears filled my eyes. "Stop it! Daddy, you're hurting me!"

He bent over me, slapping my face a couple of times.

I was kicking and throwing punches wildly, screaming at him. I punched him in the nose.

After he recovered, my dad grabbed my shirt and threw me to the other side of the room.

I hit the coffee table.

It being cheap, due to my dad using all the money for beer and alcohol, it easily broke under my weight.

"Look what you did! Your mom will me p***ed at you!"

"I didn't do it!" I protested. "You did!"

"Who do you think she'll believe? You? A stupid-a** five-year-old who needs to be punished?" He eyed me. "Or her smart husband whom she loves so? She didn't believe you when you told her I beat you, even when you showed her the bruises."

"I hate you!"

"I hate you, too, Cody!" He came at me.

I dodged him, running into my room. I slammed the door shut, locking it, then frantically searched for a place to hide. I couldn't find one. I looked over to the window.

I thought for a moment, then grabbed my suitcase I'd packed and unpacked over twenty times because I was too chicken to actually do it.

I dashed to the window. I pushed it open and swung one leg over.

My dad banged on the door.

I looked back at it.

"Cody, open this f***ing door!"

I put my other leg over, about to jump down when my dad broke the lock on the door. In one quick motion, he was behind me. He yanked my hair back.

I fell onto the ground.

He looked at me, his nostrils flaring furiously. "You're getting it now."

*END FLASHBACK*

I clutched my stomach, coughing, as more blood dripped to the ground. I needed to lay down.

I was literally out of my mind because of the excruciating pain.

I stumbled over to the beds, taking the top bunk so Billy won't punish me. I started up the ladder bars. I felt weak. My arms gave out and I fell to the ground.

I turned onto my stomach, trying to crawl-to get help.

I couldn't move.

I lay there, coughing up blood. My eyes were droopy. I tried not fall asleep, afraid that I wouldn't wake up.

But I didn't care anymore. I let the darkness take over.

* * *

I could hear voices.

"Jackson? Jackson?! C'mon. Wake up!" Nathan shook me violently.

I groaned.

"Get up, Jackson!"

I heard uncontrollable sobbing. It sounded like Taylor.

Eric was comforting her. "Taylor, he'll be okay. He'll pull through. You know he'll keep fighting."

Lex was weeping.

Daley was comforting him. "Lex, he's gonna make it. He's strong. You know that."

Nathan suddenly stopped shaking me.

I felt a small drip of water land on my lip. It tasted salty.

A warm, gentle touch rubbed my cheek softly. It was Melissa.

It hurt so much, but I couldn't move.

Melissa, please, stop. You're hurting me.

If only she could hear me.

Suddenly, more people ran into the cell, their feet pounding on the floor, sending a throb to my head with every step. People touched me all over, shaking me, inspecting me.

I couldn't get away. I was in so much pain. I couldn't take it.

I was done. I wanted to give up. I couldn't take this anymore. All this pain, physical and emotional-it never stopped.

Why did I get stuck with this? What did I do to deserve this? Why did I always hurt the people I cared most about? Maybe that's why I got stuck with this life...this death. I'd always thought they were enjoying my pain. But they weren't. They were hurting just as much as I was. I'd caused all of them so much pain. Everything I did was wrong.

They don't need me. But I couldn't live without them.

With that last thought, I found my answer.

They didn't deserve this.

Well, I wasn't going to cause them anymore pain. I was done.


	20. Nineteen Unknown

I woke up to a loud beeping noise coming from a machine beside me. Every time the machine beeped, my head would thump. A bright light shined in my eyes.

I'm dead!

Getting used to the light, I opened my eyes wider.

I looked around, seeing six teenagers standing around me. They watched me closely.

I wanted to say something, opening my mouth to begin. But I erupted into a coughing fit, blood splattering out. My chest ached. My throat burned.

After a moment, I stopped coughing.

The Asian walked over to me, gripping my hand in hers. "I'm so sorry, Jackson."

I looked at her. My voice was barely audible. "Who are you?"

* * *

Melissa stood next to me, tears falling.

*FLASHBACK*

"It's me: Melissa."

"Who?"

"Jackson, this isn't funny," the red-head said.

"Who's Jackson? Where am I? What happened?"

*END FLASHBACK*

I lay on the bed.

The guy with the hair...um...Nathan-that's his name-finished telling me what had happened.

"So...I was in jail?"

"Yeah."

"Wh-what did I do?"

"You broke into an animal shelter and let all the animals out of their cages." After a pause, Nathan said, "Do you remember why?"

I thought about this, but nothing came to mind. "No." There was silence. "What about my parents? Where are they?"

No one spoke.

"What?" I looked at each of them.

They wouldn't meet my eyes.

Finally, Nathan answered. "Your dad left when you were four. Your mom's in jail."

"Why?"

"Illegal possession of drugs."

"So...where do I live?"

After a moment, Nathan said, "With me."

"Oh, and I just remembered something." It was the guy in the straw hat...Eric. "You owe me twenty bucks."

Everyone glared at him.

"He's lying, Jackson." It was Daley's little brother, Lex.

"What?" Eric said defensively. "Can't hurt to try, right?"

I looked at each of them. My gaze stopped on the blonde.

Her name was Taylor. The glittering shoes caught my attention.

*FLASHBACK*

I turned to see a blood red Mustang with a small silver anchor statue on the hood. Melissa was at the wheel, lighting a match, a cigarette dangling from her mouth.

Startled, I fell to the ground.

The car was a couple feet from me.

The last thing I saw was a lone streetlight, it's bulb flickering, and sparkling gold shoes running toward me.

*END FLASHBACK*

I jumped, startled.

"Jackson, what is it?" Melissa said.

"I...I think...I remember something."

"What?"

"Gold shoes. Was I...hit by a car?"

Melissa looked down guiltily, nodding her head.

"You were smoking."

"Melissa, you smoke?!" Eric said.

She sighed. "Tried to. Never got the stupid thing lit."

"Why did you hit me?" I said, getting back on the main subject.

Nathan spoke. He told me a long story about how I went crazy.

"I...stabbed you?" How could I do something like that?

"Yeah. But I'm okay, now. And I paid you back."

"How?"

"You were handcuffed to a streetlight...and I left you. Then, I kicked you out of the house."

Everyone was looking at Nathan. They hadn't heard about that.

"You left him handcuffed to a streetlight?!" Daley said.

"Yeah. I was mad he lied to me after all I'd done to help him."

Everyone began talking at the same time, arguing.

After a while, I said, "I'm sorry."

Everyone looked at me.

"Did he just say, 'I'm sorry?'" Eric said.

"What?" I said.

"Anybody happen to have a video camera with them?" Eric said. "I need to record this."

"What?" I repeated.

"I don't think I've ever heard you say 'I'm sorry' before," Eric said.

There was a long silence before I broke it. "What was I like?"

Everyone looked at me, not expecting that question.

"Who was I?"

* * *

I lay in bed, thinking to myself. I wondered who I was. What else has happened in my life that I don't remember? I've lived nineteen years, and I don't remember barely any of it. From what they'd told me, my life was pretty messed up.

Maybe I can fix that.


	21. Abused Through The Mirror

I turned on the TV and flipped through the channels, thinking about something else.

"Cody Jackson..."

I immediately turned it back to the channel I heard my name on.

"...to the hospital after being severely beaten by a police officer last night. He was found unconscious on the floor of the cell by six teenagers that paid a fine to get him out of jail. These teenagers have been identified as Nathan McHugh, Taylor Hagan, Daley Marin, Lex Marin, Melissa Wu, and Eric McGorrill. They were six of the eleven that crashed on an uncharted island in the South Pacific while on a school fieldtrip to Palau..."

*FLASHBACK*

Lightning flashed, hitting the wing.

We were loosing altitude.

Someone kept screaming. The captain kept yelling.

This was my first time on a plane, and, so far, it wasn't going too great.

I closed my eyes, listening my iPod. This helped me to stay calm.

We hit the ground hard, all of us bouncing around under the seatbelts.

The plane came to a stop.

Slowly, the kids started walking out the door.

I pull myself through the emergency exit on the top of the plane. I looked around. Everything was blue.

*END FLASHBACK*

* * *

"I was in a plane crash?"

"Yeah. We were there for twenty-eight days," Nathan said.

"How did we survive?"

"We had a good leader," Nathan said, looking at Daley, who blushed.

There was silence. Then I broke it. "Uh, I was thinking that maybe if you bring me some of my stuff, it'll help me remember things faster."

Nathan looked at me. "You don't have anything."

"I don't?"

He shook his head.

I sighed, frustrated, running my hand through my hair. "How can I miss something that I don't even remember?!"

Everyone was silent, watching me.

"Um, if you want me to, I could tell you everything you told me since that time you stayed at my house," Nathan offered.

"Yeah. That'd be great."

Nathan began telling the story.

Everyone was listening in disbelief.

So was I.

* * *

"Are you sure you're remembering right?" Eric said. "I mean, I just don't believe Jackson would beg and cry."

"That's exactly what he told me," Nathan said.

Taylor was putting on her make-up again because her crying messed up her mascara. "Jackson, you sure you don't want some of this?"

"Huh?"

"Don't you remember? You-" Taylor cut herself off, crying again.

Eric comforted her.

"What is she talking about?" Nathan asked Eric.

"We went to visit Jackson after he got out of jail that second time. And she asked if he wanted any make-up to cover up his bruises."

"I...I fell...into the pool, right?" I said, remembering.

Eric nodded.

"And then I mopped."

"Yeah. I remember that," Nathan said. "Oh, bad choice of words."

"I'm barely remembering the last two weeks. What about the rest of my life? What if I don't get my memory back? I'll never know about that part of me." I'd always have an empty space inside of me. I'd always be broken.

Taylor handed me her small mirror. "Look in this."

"Why?"

"Trust me. Tell me what you see."

I sighed and looked into the mirror.

I looked horrible. I had bruises and cuts everywhere.

I looked into my eyes.

*FLASHBACK*

Before I knew what I was doing, I walked around the back of the shelter and kicked the door in.

An alarm went off.

Quickly, I began unlocking the cages.

Animals were everywhere. There were dogs, cats, birds, hamsters, rabbits, snakes, and a lot more.

I came to the last cage. An old black lab lay inside. The face was familiar.

I paused in front of the cage for what seemed like an eternity.

It had been abused...just like me.

I heard a gun shot, followed by the yelp of a dog.

*END FLASHBACK*

I dropped the mirror, startled.

"I was abused." It was a whisper.

"What?" Taylor said.

"When I was little...I was abused."


	22. Armed Robbery Of Your Stolen Memories

I lay there, thinking. Nineteen years of my life went by, and I don't remember a thing.

I haven't slept and I've barely eaten anything in four days. My eyes had bags under them. I was a bit skinnier.

I tried to remember my life.

How did I live it, but not remember it? It's got to be somewhere in my mind. But how do I find it?

* * *

"Jackson, you need to rest," Daley said.

I stared at the wall. My voice was flat. "I'm not tired."

"It doesn't matter if-"

"Yes, it does! I don't need to sleep if I'm not tired. I have my whole life to remember."

"Well, can you, at least, eat?" Nathan said.

"I did."

"Yeah. Like, two bites."

"I still ate."

Melissa held my hand.

*FLASHBACK*

"Mel, I don't know what's going on between Taylor and me-"

"Stop, okay?" She stands up and starts walking. "You don't owe me an explanation."

I stand up and follow her.

"Just because I have feelings for you doesn't mean you have to feel the same way."

I step in front of her. "But I do."

*END FLASHBACK*

I look into Melissa's eyes.

*FLASHBACK*

Melissa walks up to me. "Hi."

I stand up. "Oh, hey. I, uh..." I pull her video diary tape that Taylor showed everyone out of my pocket. "...got something for you."

She takes it.

"You should probably keep that in a safe place."

Melissa blushed. "Oh, I will."

"Listen. Um, since we all have to live together here, I think it'd be kinda weird for any of us to get...you know."

Melissa nods. "Yeah, it's okay. Just forget this happened. I'm so embarrassed. I know we're just friends." She walks away.

I call after her. "But maybe when-"

Melissa stops.

"-we get back home, I could...give you a call or something."

Melissa tries to hide her smile with a shrug. "Yeah, I'd like that."

I smile. "Give me a hand here?"

Melissa nods.

"Alright." I hand her some coconuts and we finish laying them out on the beach to form the word '_help_.'

*END FLASHBACK*

"Mel...I remember."

"You remember what?"

"Me and you...on the island."

She smiles.

"Did I call you?"

Her smile fades.

I can take the hint. "Mel, I'm sorry."

"It's okay. You called and told me to meet you, but you got in a street race and ended up in jail."

"I'm really sorry, Mel."

"It's okay, Jackson."

If looking at Melissa gave me a memory of her, maybe I'd get another one of me if I check in Taylor's mirror again. "Taylor, can I see that mirror you showed me yesterday?"T

aylor digs through her purse. "Sure." When she finds it, she hands it to me.

I look in it, staring straight into my eyes.

*FLASHBACK*

I took a quivering breath, preparing myself. I lifted my shirt, revealing a black object sticking out of my pants.

I closed my eyes, taking a few more deep breaths.

I hyped myself up.

C'mon, Jackson. You can do this. You have to do this. You need this money.

I pulled the gun from my waist, holding it tightly, my hand trembling.

I opened my eyes, staring back into them through the mirror.

What was I doing? I'm not a monster. Cody Jackson is not a monster...right?

I tore my eyes from the mirror, turning to the door.

I gripped the gun tightly, with confidence now. I was going to do this.

Looking at the black object, the dream I'd had of Melissa shooting me in the head played in my mind.

Melissa pulled the trigger.

Was I really going to take someone's life? For money?

I couldn't.

I had to. I need this.

I, Cody Jackson, was a monster.

My hand froze when it touched the door handle. I couldn't do this.

Yes, I could.

I put the hood over my head, then turned the handle quickly, before I could change my mind. There was no turning back now.

Before I knew what I was doing, I dropped the gun into a garbage can outside the bathroom, then left the gas station.

*END FLASHBACK*

"I'm a monster," I whispered, my hands trembling.

"Do you remember something else?" Taylor said.

"I almost robbed a gas station. I had a gun."

Lex spoke. "Why were you going to rob it?"

"I needed the money. I hadn't eaten much or slept in a while."

They were silent.

"What is wrong with me?" It was barely audible. Tears fell as Melissa pulled me into a hug.

*FLASHBACK*

"Time's up." The officer smirked.

I stood up as quick as I could and began walking toward him.

Melissa grabbed my arm.

I turned to face her.

She wrapped her arms around me, slowly and softly.

I couldn't help but wince.

All of a sudden, the policeman pulled me back by my shirt.

I fell to the ground with a yelp.

"Didn't we talk about this yesterday, Cody? When I say, 'Time's up,' I mean get off your a** and move. I think I'll have to teach you another lesson when we get back to your cell." He kicked my side.

I yelled.

"Since I'm feeling generous, I'll give you a second to give your girlfriend, here, a goodbye-for-six-years hug, because you won't be able to get anymore visitors since you don't come when I say, 'Time's up.'" The officer look out a key and unlocked my handcuffs.

My wrists were pink. I rubbed them for a moment before looking at Melissa.

She was sobbing.

"Mel, don't cry."

"This was my fault. I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"Mel, it's okay. I'll be okay. I promise." I wrapped my arms around her, despite the pain I was in.

She wrapped her arms around me.

I flinched slightly.

After we pulled apart, I looked into her eyes, and she looked into mine.

We moved closer to each other for a kiss.

My lips were centimeters from hers. I could feel her warm breath.

Our lips were just about to brush together when I was yanked back.

I fell to the ground, yelling.

"Let's go!" The officer tugged on the back of my shirt, pulling me to my feet.

I yelped.

He threw me against the wall, snatching my hands behind me, earning another yell from me. He forced my face into the wall as he tightly cuffed my hands, pinching the skin.

He yanked me away, and we turned to leave. He called over his shoulders to the others. "Say goodbye to Cody. You won't be seeing him for a very long time."

Everyone was silent. Even Eric didn't have a remark.

The officer pushed me toward the door.

I stumbled, wincing.

The last voice that I heard before walking unsteadily back to my cell belonged to Taylor. "Who the heck is Cody?"

*END FLASHBACK*

My breaths quivered. I removed myself from Melissa's hug, pulling up my shirt to check my side. There was a huge bruise covering it. I slowly pulled my shirt back down.

"Did I hurt you?" Melissa said.

"No. I remembered it was there."

Everyone was silent.

After a while, I said, "I've only remembered one thing that was happy. Why don't I have happy memories?"

"Last time I checked, you didn't have a happy life," Eric said.

Nathan glared at him.

"Okay. Too early for jokes," said Eric.

"I don't want to remember anymore." Tears fell down my cheeks.

Melissa brought me into another hug.

I didn't let go. I cried into her shoulder until I fell asleep.


	23. Song To Remember

The room was dark and empty.

I lay in the bed, trying to fall asleep.

Unintentionally, my hand reached to a cross lying on my chest.

I felt a sudden sensation of comfort.

I soon fell asleep.

* * *

I stared into the fire, guitar in hand.

I began strumming. Immediately, everyone got quiet, listening, watching me, surprised.

I sang.

_It's just another morning glory  
__One more twisted side of this wild ride  
Another chapter in the story  
But I can't hide the way I feel inside_

_'Cause I'm a stranger in a strange land  
And I'm a million miles from my home  
If I gotta take my last stand  
Well, I won't stand alone  
Well, I won't stand alone_

_Well, I won't stand alone  
__Well, I won't stand alone  
__Well, I won't stand alone  
__Well, I won't stand alone_


	24. Visible Through Foundation

"Mel, I remember."

"Remember what?"

"Everything! The island. The street race. Jail. I remember my whole life!"

"Really! That's great!"

"So, it just all came back to you?" Lex questioned.

"Yeah."

"What school did you go to before Hartwell?" Nathan said.

I thought for a moment. "Chavez."

"When I gave you a ride home from school that first day I met you, what CD did you put in?"

"Samoan rap."

"Before you put the CD in, what radio station were we listening to?"

Everyone looked at me expectedly, tensed.

I looked down, thinking.

*FLASHBACK*

Nathan turned on the stereo.

All it had in the CD player was his dad's music. It started playing some ancient Smokey Robinson song.

"Sorry," Nathan said. "My old man's tunes."

*END FLASHBACK*

"Radio station? Um...."

Everyone stared at me.

Maybe I didn't remember everything.

I sighed. "I don't know," I admitted truthfully. "I thought it was your dad's Smokey Robinson CD."

Nathan smiled. "It was."

I looked at him. "But you asked for-"

"It was a trick question. I was making sure you really remembered."

Everyone relaxed, smiling.

"Jackson's back!" Taylor bent down to hug me. She quickly stopped when I winced. "Sorry."

"That's okay."

"You sure you don't want any make-up?"

"Yes, Taylor. I'm sure."


	25. When Your Past Comes Back To Kill You

I looked out the window next to me.

The sky was dark. Rain poured. Thunder boomed. Lightning flashed.

"Cody Jackson, you're free to go."

I got out of bed. I walked out the door and down the hall, stepping into the elevator.

There were a couple of people in there.

I pressed the button for the first floor.

The elevator headed up, dropping the people going to higher levels off first.

We stopped. The door slid open.

A woman in her thirties stepped on, a teddy bear in her arms. Connected to the bear was a small balloon. It read, _'It's a boy_.' "Ninth floor, please."

I pressed the button for her.

At each floor, people spilled off the elevator as others piled on. When we reached the top, no one stepped in, just off.

The door closed. The elevator started downward.

I could hear thunder rumbling in the distance.

All of sudden, the elevator went dark, coming to a violent halt.

"Hello, Cody."

I recognized the voice.

It was Moe.

I turned. I could just barely see him in the darkness.

He pulled something out of his waistband.

I put my hands in the air innocently, backing into a corner.

He stepped toward me. Moe put the object under my chin.

I raised my head slightly, swallowing hard.

He kneed my lower stomach.

I winced, trying not to show pain.

Cocking the gun, he moved it to my forehead.

I exhaled shakily, trying to calm my breathing. Squeezing my eyes shut tight, I gulped silently.

So this is it.

"Leave him alone!"

I opened my eyes to see Samantha punching Moe's back.

Moe whipped around, pushing Samantha to the floor. Slowly, he pointed the gun at her.

I jumped on him, startling him.

He fired. The bullet just missed Samantha, hitting the side of the elevator, creating a small hole. Moe stumbled, waving his arms wildly, shooting all over the place. He grabbed my shirt, then bent down, flipping me over him.

I landed on my back, next to Samantha, almost hitting her, my feet by her head, my head by her feet.

Moe pulled me to my feet by the back of my shirt with surprisingly strong force.

I slammed into the corner, hitting my side. I yelled.

Seeing my weakness, Moe poked the gun into my side."

Ahhh!" I leaned my head onto the wall, squeezing my eyes closed.

He laughed. "Never thought I'd live to hear Cody Jackson screaming in pain." Enjoying this, he stabbed the gun harder into my side.

"Ahhhh! S***!" I slammed my fist against the metal elevator. "F*** you, Moe." I spat in his face.

He removed the gun from my ribs.

I exhaled, relieved.

Then I felt his fist pound into my side. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I fell to the floor, grabbing my side.

"Stop it!" Samantha screamed.

"Samantha, stay outta this." I could barely speak.

Moe's foot came down into my side.

"Ahhhhhhh!"

"Leave him alone! Stop it!" Samantha started punching Moe again, until he pushed her onto the floor.

"Samantha, stay the f*** outta this!" I yelled.

Tears fell from her eyes.

"Awww. Look at that, Cody. You made her cry."

I looked into Samantha's eyes.

They were full of hurt and pain.

I remembered that last day in jail-how I'd thought everyone enjoyed my pain, but I was just causing them to hurt.

My voice was quiet. "Samantha, I'm sorry. I didn't-Ahhhhhhh!" A foot came into my side again. But it wasn't Moe's. "Samantha, what'd you do that for?!"

She just walked to the other side of the elevator and sat.

"Samantha, I'm-Ahhhh!"

Moe kicked my side.

"I didn't mean it. It just came out. I promise, Samantha. I'm-Ahhhhhhhh! S***! F***, Moe! D***it!" I yelled through clenched teethed. I started coughing blood.

Moe dragged me to my feet by my shirt. He held me up against the wall, putting the gun to my face again. "Now, whose the f*** ***hole in distress, you son of a b***?"

I coughed up more blood before whispering, "Still you."

Moe punched my lower stomach.

I bent forward, holding my stomach, coughing.

His knee made contact with my face.

My head flew back, then slammed into the wall.

Moe grabbed my shirt, and pulled.

I fell to the cold, metal floor. I lifted my head, looking straight ahead.

Samantha sat, watching me, tears in her eyes.

I couldn't speak, so I mouthed the words, "_I'm sorry_." I pressed my forehead and hands into the floor, trying to push myself up.

When my stomach was no longer touching the ground, Moe slammed his arm into my back.

I hit the ground.

I tried to get up again.

He kicked my side, flipping me onto my back.

"Ahhhhh!"

"Watch this, Cody." Moe stood above me, pointing the gun toward Samantha.

I couldn't let him hurt her. I'd already done that.

I gathered all my strength, then kicked him hard in the lower stomach.

He fell on the floor beside me.

I rolled on top of him, punching, trying to get the gun out of his hand.

Moe slugged his fist into my side.

"Ahhhhh!"

He pushed me off of him, then quickly stood. Moe pulled me to my knees. "Any last words?" He pushed the gun into my head and cocked it.

I tilted my head away from the gun. "F*** you, Moe!"

"Okay, then," he said.

I looked at Samantha.

She had tears in her eyes. Her expression was a mixture of emotions. She was sad and scared. But at the same time, she felt hurt and pained.

Tears fell from my eyes. "I'm sorry, Samantha."

I looked at the metal floor, just barely able to see my reflection. I stared at myself, furious. How could I yell at Samantha for trying to help. What kind of person did that? What's wrong with me?

"Goodbye, Cody." Moe pulled the trigger.


	26. Fault Line With Unshed Tears

I lay on the hospital bed.

*FLASHBACK*

"Goodbye, Cody." Moe pulled the trigger.

Nothing happened.

He pulled the trigger again.

Still nothing. "S***!" Having no more bullets from when he'd shot after I'd jumped on him, Moe hit my head with the gun.

I fell forward.

Moe yanked my hair up, then back down, slamming my head onto the floor. He turned me over, stepping onto my side.

"Ahhhhhhhhhh!" I couldn't take the pain. I wanted to give up.

But I couldn't. I didn't know what Moe would do to Samantha when I was gone.

I fought to stay awake, my eyes feeling droopy.

Suddenly, my hand felt warm.

I looked beside me to see Samantha holding my hand.

"I forgive you," she said.

I was about to smile at her when Moe's foot bared down harder into my side.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" I tried not to squeeze Samantha's hand. I didn't want to hurt her anymore than I already had. I clenched my other hand into a fist, squeezing my eyes together.

I felt Moe leave my side.

I opened my eyes to see him slowly walking to my other side, toward Samantha.

The girl let go of my hand, backing into a corner.

I grabbed Moe's ankle.

He fell to the floor, then looked back and kicked my face.

I let go.

He stood back up, heading toward Samantha.

I gathered my strength.

I stood up, then quickly stumbled toward Samantha.

I got there just in time. I stepped in front of Samantha to block Moe from her. "Leave her alone, Moe."

He laughed. "Who's gonna stop me? You?"

I glanced behind me.

Samantha had tears streaming down her face, crying uncontrollably.

I looked back up, unsure. "Yeah."

All of a sudden, the lights came back on, blinding us since we were used to the dark. The doors began to open.

"S***!" Moe slapped me hard with the back of his hand and ran out the door.

I fell to the floor, hitting my head against the elevator wall.

*END FLASHBACK*

Melissa took my hand.

I stared at it blankly.

Eric whispered to Nathan. "Does he remember who we are?"

Hearing him, I spoke. "Why? You gonna tell me that I owe you fifty bucks?"

"Twenty, thank you very much," Eric said. Then he added, "But fifty works, too."

I sighed slowly, but still felt pain in my side. "Doesn't matter. I don't have any money."

Eric suddenly realized, mumbling, "That would've worked on anyone else but you." Seeing that I heard him, he quickly added, "No offense."

There was a knock at the door.

A police officer stepped into the room. "Cody Jackson?"

"Yeah?"

"We're about to view the tape of what happened in the elevator. We need you there."

A nurse walked into the room, pushing a wheelchair. She helped me into it.

Before we left the room, Eric said, "Can we go?"

I knew he just wanted to see me getting beat up, but I didn't care anymore.

"If that's okay with Cody," the officer said.

"Sure," I said.

The nurse began pushing me down the hall.

Everyone else followed.

I drummed my fingers on the armrests of the chair nervously.

Something pushed down on my hands.

I looked over to see Melissa.

She put my hand in hers.

* * *

The police fast-forwarded the tape to the part where I stepped onto the elevator.

I looked around the room.

We were all crowded around the TV in a half circle.

Taylor stood beside me. Nathan and Daley were next to her, followed by Lex. Eric was the closest to the TV, wanting to make sure he didn't miss a single part. Melissa stood on the other side of me. Next to her, Samantha lay asleep, her head on her father's shoulder. He rubbed her back.

The only one missing was Moe. He ran off the elevator and down some stairs.

We'd only gotten to the sixth floor when the elevator stopped, so they'd had enough time to warn security before Moe had gotten out the door.

He was arrested and taken to jail.

The officer played the tape. He pointed to the screen, talking the whole time about what was happening.

We could already see it. We didn't need to hear it, too.

The elevator stopped, its lights going dim. The screen automatically turned into night vision.

Everyone was gazing at the TV, silent, listening to the officer.

I sat, staring at the screen blankly, barely hearing the policeman.

I watched everyone.

Eric stared, shock on his face. Lex held on to his sister tightly. Daley squeezed Nathan's hand. Nathan's mouth was open in disbelief. Taylor jumped throughout the video, her hand over her mouth. Melissa had tears rolling down her cheeks, sniffling, watching as Moe held the gun to my face.

I put my hand in hers.

She looked at me.

I squeezed her hand for a second, giving her a reassuring look.

She forced a smile, then turned her eyes back to the screen.

Samantha's father stared at the screen, watching his daughter step out of the corner.

I'd found out Samantha was in there because she'd lost her dad when all the people crowded off the elevator. They'd been at the hospital to visit her grandfather, who was sick with pneumonia.

Samantha began punching Moe's back with her small fists.

Her father had silent tears falling when Moe pointed the gun at her. Then shock filled his face when I jumped on Moe.

I watched the screen again.

I could still feel the gun poking into my side. I flinched with every kick.

I was relieved that there was no sound. I didn't want them to know I'd yelled at Samantha, especially her father. But they could probably see that I had. I hoped her father couldn't tell I was cussing in front of her. What else can you do when someone's beating the s*** out of you?

I saw Eric's mouth drop open. He could tell that I was screaming when Moe poked the gun into my side, even though he couldn't hear it. Then he smiled faintly as I spat in Moe's face. But his smile quickly fell when I dropped to the floor.

I watched Samantha's father as Samantha began punching Moe in the back again. I tried to see if he could tell I'd yelled at Samantha. I couldn't tell. His mouth opened with surprise when Samantha kicked my side.

Eric couldn't help putting a wide grin on his face at this sight.

Who wouldn't laugh when a nineteen year old guy was getting beat up by a six year old girl? Oh, that's right: me. Because I happened to be that nineteen year old guy.

I watched myself talking to Samantha. Then I was interrupted by my own scream after Moe's foot came into my side. I kept talking to Samantha, but broke into a scream before I could ever say '_I'm sorry._'

Taylor covered her eyes as I coughed up blood when Moe hit my lower stomach.

Moe pulled me up, putting the gun in my face.

Melissa sniffled.

Taylor peeked through her fingers.

I was thrown to the floor. When I tried to get up, Moe knocked me back down.

I looked at Samantha's father.

He was breathing hard, staring at the screen as Moe pointed the gun at his daughter. He exhaled shakily when Moe fell to the floor beside me after I'd kicked him.

Everyone sighed with relief as I got on top of Moe.

I was punching him with one hand, trying to get the gun away from him with the other.

They tensed when Moe punched my side.

I fell over as Moe stood up.

Everyone was crying or close to it as they watched Moe pull me to my knees and point the gun to my head.

Taylor jumped as Moe pulled the trigger. But nothing happened. She exhaled shakily, a small whimper escaping her lips.

I fell to the floor, screaming as Moe stepped on my side, trying to inflict as much pain as possible.

Samantha's father watched his daughter crawl toward me, taking my hand. He couldn't tell what she said. I could tell he was proud of her for comforting me as Moe bared down harder into my side. His face went pale as Samantha cowered into a corner. He watched Moe walk toward her. Then he relaxed visibly when I pulled Moe to the floor.

Everyone in the room tensed as Moe stood, continuing toward Samantha.

The suspense was killing them. I could tell they didn't want Samantha to get hurt just as much as they didn't want me to get hurt.

But I could understand that. I was older. I've been through h***. I could take way more than she could.

Melissa squeezed my hand tight.

I tried to stay quiet, gripping the armrest of the wheelchair with my other hand, my knuckles turning white. I couldn't take it anymore. "Mel..." My voice cracked.

Everyone glanced at me, wondering what was happening.

Melissa looked down. Seeing that I was in pain, she dropped my hand. "Sorry."

The color returned to my knuckles as I let go of the armrest, exhaling.

Everybody turned back to the screen, watching me get up, barely making it to Samantha in time.

I looked back up to Melissa, taking her hand again.

Everyone sighed with relief as the camera changed from night vision back to normal, then flinched as Moe slapped my cheek with the back of his hand before running out the door.

I could still feel the sting in my cheek. I reached up to touch it, then quickly pulled back, feeling pain.

The policeman stopped the tape.

Everyone stared at me. Lex, Taylor, Melissa, and Samantha's father had tears falling down their face. Eric, Daley, and Nathan had watery, red eyes.

I tried to avoid them, looking down. I couldn't look at them. They were hurt. I'd caused them pain...again.

A single tear fell from my eyes and landed on my lap. I stared at it, my vision blurry. More tears fell.


	27. Unreturned Words

The room was silent, everyone's eyes on me.

I met eyes with each of them, feeling their pain, knowing I'd caused this. Guilt rushed through me with each person I looked at.

I hung my head. "I'm sorry." It was barely a whisper.

Melissa walked over to me, sitting on the bed next to me, putting my hand in hers. "For what?"

I didn't speak.

"Jackson, what's wrong?" Melissa put her hand under my chin, gently pushing it up.

Everyone looked at me.

My eyes were red, tears falling down my face. I looked at each one of them again. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I do the things I do. I don't mean to cause you guys so much pain. You don't deserve this. My life is so f*-sorry, Lex-messed up, and I shouldn't have brought you into it. It's my fault you guys hurt so much. And I'm sorry." I dropped my head.

Melissa looked at me. "Jackson, it's not your-"

"Yes, it is Mel!" After realizing I'd yelled at Melissa, my head flew up.

She had tears falling down her cheek.

"I'm sorry, Mel. I didn't mean to. I-I wasn't…" I trailed off, getting frustrated. "S*-" I tried to stop cursing in front of Lex, but it only made me more frustrated. "F*-sorry, Lex. I got a dirty mouth." I sighed, calming myself down. "I'm sorry, guys. I'm sorry, Mel. I didn't mean to yell at you. It's just that...I'm tired of causing so much pain. I guess I deserve being hurt after all the pain I've caused."

Taylor began to cry, sad that I was hurting.

I'd done it again.

I clenched my fists, furious with myself. "S***!" I realized I'd cussed again and tried to apologize. "D***it! I'm-" I put my head in my hands. "What is wrong with me?!"

I felt Melissa's hand on my back and winced.

She quickly removed it. "Jackson, we don't blame you. Just remember, we're here for...no matter what."

A voice came to my head. "I'll be there for you, Cody Jackson...if you want me to be."

I looked up, then hugged her. Without thinking, I said, "I love you, Mel."


	28. Lesson Of A Hundred Bucks To Live On

I'd messed it up. Why did I say that? I'm so stupid.

*FLASHBACK*

"I love you, Mel."

She was silent. She pulled away from me and got up. Melissa headed for the door, tears in her eyes.

"I-I didn't mean to say that. Mel, I'm sorry."

She ran out the door.

I stared after her.

The room was silent until Eric spoke. "So, who's up for cafeteria food?"

*END FLASHBACK*

I'm such an idiot. Now she won't want to talk to me anymore.

Good going, Jackson. You just screwed everything up...again.

There was a knock at the door.

"What do you want?" I said, my voice cold.

The door opened and Samantha ran in. She jumped onto the bed and pulled me into a hug.

I winced, then hugged her back.

I looked in the doorway and saw her father walking in. I tried to tug Samantha off me, but she wouldn't budge.

Her father walked toward us.

"This isn't what it looks like," I said quickly. "I can explain."

"It's okay. I'm not gonna hurt you," he said.

"Then why are you here?"

"Samantha, can you give us some time alone for a minute, please?"

Samantha stopped hugging me and went to look out the window at the stormy sky.

Lightning flashed, soon followed by thunder.

"To apologize. I'm sorry about leaving you in the park that day. Your friends told me how you were falsely accused of rape. I didn't know. I didn't want my daughter to get hurt."

"It's okay. I understand."

"And I wanted to thank you...for saving Samantha."

"You're welcome."

"Oh, and I got..." He began pulling something out of his wallet. "...something for you."

I looked at the hundred dollar bill he held in his hand. "I can't accept that."

"Yeah, you can. C'mon. Take it. It's the least I could do."

I sighed and took the money from him. "Thanks."

"No. Thank you. My name's Riley, by the way. Riley Blint."

"Cody Jackson." I reached my arm out for him to shake.

He stared at it for a second, then quickly pulled me into a hug.

I winced, not expecting this, then hugged him back.

He straightened, looking at his watch. "Well, it's getting late. We'd better go. C'mon, Samantha. Say goodbye to Cody. I'll wait for you outside the door." With that, he walked out.

Samantha came over to me, then pulled me into another hug. "Bye, Cody."

I hugged her back. "Bye, Samantha."

She let go and slid off the bed, then walked to the door.

"Hey, Samantha?"

She looked at me. "Yeah?"

"Um, can you give this back to your dad?"

"Sure." She walked over and took the hundred bucks from my hand.

"Thanks. But make sure you wait until you're in the car and leaving, okay?"

"I will." She headed back to the door. When she touched the handle, she turned to me. "I'm gonna miss you, Cody Jackson." With that, she turned the handle and walked out of the room.

When she was gone, I said, "I'll miss you, too, Samantha."


	29. A Man's Work Is Never Done

_Chapter Twenty-Nine: A Man's Work Is Never Done…Unless He Quits Or Gets Fired._

* * *

"Cody Jackson, you're free to go."

"If I had a penny for every time I've heard that one..." I mumbled, standing up. I walked down the hall slowly, hands in pockets.

I waited for the elevator. When it arrived, I checked to see who was in it. Finding no danger, I stepped inside, pressing the button for the first floor. Then I leaned against the side of the elevator, placing my hands back inside my pockets, resting a foot on the wall.

The elevator door opened.

I stepped out, looking around. I spotted Nathan lounging back on a chair in the lobby.

He looked up at me. "I really gotta get me one of these chairs for my room. They're so comfortable. Ready to go?"

"Yeah."

* * *

"Nice to see you back, Cody." Nelson patted my shoulder.

"Yeah." When I turned to walk up the stairs, I mumbled, "Sure it is."

"Cody?" he called to me.

"Yeah?" I opened the door to my room.

"What did you say?"

"Yes sir?" I corrected myself, looking around the room.

There were boxes stacked everywhere, creating very little walking space. I stepped back out, closing the door behind me.

Did I have the wrong room?

I headed downstairs.

"I rearranged the room," Nelson said.

"So I've noticed. Where am I supposed to sleep?"

"Pool house." Nelson dangled a few keys in his hand, pulled one off the keychain, and handed it to me.

I took it, then walked to the pool house.

Inside, I found a bed, a refrigerator, a bathroom, a TV, a computer, and a whole lot more.

Nelson had followed me. "You like it?"

I smiled. "Yes sir."

"Good." He turned to leave. "I will collect rent on the first day of every month."

The smile drained from my face. "Rent?"

He turned back to me. "Yeah."

"But I don't-"

"Cody, you're nineteen-almost twenty. It's about time you take responsibility. And, plus, it's the least you could do after all that money I've spent to get you out of jail three times."

"But where am I supposed to get money?"

Before leaving, Nelson said, "Get a job."

* * *

*FLASHBACK*

"You start Monday."

"Thanks." I walked out of the fast food restaurant and got into the car.

Nathan sat in the driver's seat. "So, did you get it?"

"Yeah."

"Finally. This has been, like, the fourth place we've been to today."

"Seventh," I corrected him.

"I don't understand why those places didn't hire you."

"Mostly because of background checks."

Nathan was silent.

I have about two and a half weeks to get $300. Rent costs $400, but I already have $100 from my previous jobs that I just couldn't seem to keep.

Let's just hope I could get this money.

*END FLASHBACK*

There was a knock on the door.

Here we go.

I walked to the door and opened it.

"Rent's due." Nelson held out his hand for me to give him the money. "Pay up."

I reached into my back pocket and pulled out my wallet, then looked inside. S***! I pulled out all the money I had, handing it to Nelson.

He stood there, counting it. "You're a hundred dollars short."

"I couldn't get the money," I said quietly.

"You had a whole month. How could you not get the money?!" He was getting angry.

"It took a while to find a job. No one would hire me with my background. Plus, I'm only paid minimum wage. And I gotta buy food."

"It was hard for me to find a job when I was your age, but I did after I got a little education. Look where it got me." Nelson pointed to his house.

"But I don't have any money for college."

"Guess you shouldn't have dropped out of high school, then, huh, Cody? You could've gone to college with a full scholarship, but you quit only three months before graduation."

*FLASHBACK*

"Is Melissa here?"

"Oh, hey, Cody. Yeah, she's upstairs in her room. You can go on up if you want," Melissa's mother said.

"Thanks." I stepped into the house and walked upstairs, heading toward Melissa's room. It was the second door on the right.

I knocked on the door.

There was no answer.

"Mel?" I knocked again.

There was still no answer.

I turned the knob and stepped inside.

She wasn't in here.

"Mel?"

I heard a cry coming from the bathroom.

"Mel?" I headed to the door, then knocked on it. "Mel, you in there?"

There was another cry. "Mel, it's me: Jackson."

I heard a crash.

"Mel!" I rushed inside.

Melissa lay on the floor, razor in hand, wrists bleeding.

"Melissa! What the h*** are you doing?!"

She cried.

I sat on the floor next to her. Gently, I grabbed her arms, pulling her up to look at me. "Mel, what's wrong?"

Between sobs, she said, "They...they won't stop."

"Who won't stop, Mel?"

"The kids...kids at school."

"What are they doing?"

She didn't answer.

"Mel, what did they do?"

"They keep...p-p-picking on m-me."

"Why?"

She looked into my eyes. "B-because I...hang out with y-you."

"So? What's wrong with that?"

"They keep talking...about m-me and you...together all the time. They know...about your past. They won't stop b-bullying me."

"How long has this been going on, Mel?"

"Almost two...two years. Ever since...we got back from...from the i-island."

"I'm so sorry, Mel. I didn't know." I took the razor from her. "But you can't keep doing this to yourself."

"Then what am I supposed to do, Jackson?! Huh?! They won't stop! I'm tired of it! I can't take it anymore!"

I was silent for a moment, looking down.

Blood was all over the floor, some still dripping from her arm.

My eyes were still on the ground when I spoke with a quiet voice. "I'll quit."

*END FLASHBACK*

"Look. Can I just...pay you the money when I get it?"

"I don't know. Can you?"

"May I pay you the money when I get it?"

"You got one week," he said firmly. "And you better pay your rent on time next month."

"Alright."

Nelson looked at me.

"Yes, sir."

"One week." He put his index finger in my face. "But if you don't pay me by then..." He pointed his thumb behind him. "...you're out of here."

"Yes, Mr. McHugh." When he looked at me, I quickly added, "Sir."

* * *

"Cody, come here."

I left the cash register and walked to the manager.

"You're supposed to smile like you want to be here when you take orders."

"But I don't wanna be here."

It's not bad enough that the boss tells me to smile, pretending I want to be at work when I'd rather be anywhere else. He makes me call in every week to ask for my hours, too. And it turns into a whole extra job finding out when I'm supposed to be at my job.

So, whenever I explain these issues, the same thing always happens.

"If you hate it so much, why don't you just quit?"

"Good point. I quit."


	30. Steet Life Hidden In The Poolhouse

"What is this?!" Nelson's expression was furious.

"You went through my stuff?!"

Nathan tried to calm his father. "Dad-"

"No!" he said, facing Nathan. Then he turned back to me. "What is this?"

I was silent.

"Tell me!"

"It's nothing!" I grabbed the prescription bottle from Nelson, then slammed the dresser drawer shut after throwing the bottle inside.

"It doesn't look like nothing!"

"Well, it is!"

He looked at me.

"I'm not stupid, Cody."

I didn't say anything.

"Are you taking drugs?"

"What?! No!"

"Then what are they?!"

"Nothing!"

Nelson and I began yelling at each other at the same time.

After a while, Nathan spoke. His voice was quiet, but we still heard him over our yelling. "Dad, they're mine."

Nelson and I looked at Nathan in shock, suddenly silent.

"What?!" Nelson yelled at him.

"They're mine."

"I don't believe this. How could you do this, Nathan?!"

Nathan was silent, staring at the floor.

"Nathan, look at me!"

Nathan's head flew up, tears in his eyes.

I couldn't let him take the blame. I sighed, cursing to myself. "They're not his, Mr. McHugh. They're mine."

Nathan looked at me.

"Now, that-I believe," Nelson said. "Nathan, get up stairs! I can't believe you would try to cover for him!"

"But, Dad-"

"Go!"

Nathan hesitantly headed to the house.

Nelson turned back to me. "What are they?!"

"Ecstasy."

"Ecstasy?! What are you doing with ecstasy?! Are you taking them?!"

"No, I'm not-"

"Then why do you have them?!" Sudden realization rushed over Nelson. Quietly, he spoke. "Are you selling drugs, Cody?"

I was silent. "Answer me! Are you selling drugs?!"

I sighed, closing my eyes. When I opened them, I said, "Yes."

"What?!"

"I got fired," I said quickly. "I didn't have any money to pay rent, and-"

"I don't care! I could call the cops on you for this and have you arrested!"

I sat on the bed. My elbows rested on my knees, my head hung, my hands on the back of my neck. My leg was nervously shaking up and down.

"Give them to me," Nelson ordered.

I looked up, removing my hands from my neck. "What?"

"Give them to me." When I didn't reply, he said, "Now!"

I looked back down, then sighed. I walked over to the dresser and pulled the bottle from the drawer, handing them to Nelson.

He took it, then gave me a look, still holding out his hand.

I sighed and pulled out another pill bottle, handing it to him.

Nelson still stared at me.

I sighed, pulling out a couple more pill bottles, some of which I'd gotten from the medicine cabinet in his bathroom.

"Are those my-"

I nodded.

"Keep 'em coming."

I opened a few other drawers, pulling out bottles and film containers, different types of pills in each. I threw them on the bed, then walked into the bathroom, coming out with a few more prescription bottles, two syringes, and three small sandwich bags. I reached under the mattress, pulling out several bags and small colorful balloons filled with heroin. After that was done, I pulled out a screw-driver from the computer desk and picked up the TV remote controller. After getting the battery compartment open, I pulled out a small bag, throwing it on the bed. Then I unscrewed a few wall plates and the air conditioning vent, pulling a few bags from them. I headed toward the desk, twirling the screw-driver around between my fingers, then set the screw-driver back down. Next, I picked up a few pens, taking them apart and throwing the contents hidden inside onto the bed. Pulling the computer chair into the middle of the room, I stepped onto it, reaching for the ceiling fan. I felt around the top of the blades, ripping pieces of duct tape. When I jumped off the chair, I had four small bags in my hand. I dropped them onto the bed.

I'd gotten most of the drugs from a friends. He was a very rich man. His money came from the selling business. He'd decided that his life was headed in the wrong direction. So he turned it around. He gave what he'd had to me, seeing that I needed the money.

"That's all I got."

Nelson stared at me, shocked. "Cody, what is wrong with you?! This is illegal! What were you thinking?!"

"I told you." I sat in the computer chair, looking down. "I didn't have the money. I've quit or been fired at least four times. No one else would hire me. I had to pay for this somehow. I don't have anywhere else to go. What was I supposed to do?"

Nelson was furious. He tried to calm himself when he said, "I want you out of here."

I looked up. Seeing that he was serious, I got out of the chair. "But I-"

"Get out!"

"Please, Mr. McHugh. Don't do this to me. I'll stop if you want me to. I'll-"

"Do you want me to call the cops, Cody?! Get off of my property! Now!"

I looked at him for a second, then pushed past him and out the door.

Where am I supposed to go now?

* * *

"Jackson? What are you doing here? Why'd you climb up the balcony?"

My eyes had tears falling from them. "Melissa, can I stay here tonight?"

"What?!"

"Please, Mel."

"Are you crazy?! Do you know what my parents would do if they caught you in here?"

I looked down, slightly nodding, then turned. I swung my legs over the balcony railing.

Before I could leap to the ground, Melissa gripped my arm. "Jackson, wait."

I faced her.

After a moment, she said, "C'mon." She tugged my arm.

I stepped back onto the balcony and followed her into her room.

"Here. You take the bed."

"No, Mel. That's okay. I can sleep on the floor."

"It's okay, Jackson."

"No, Mel. It's not. I'll be fine on the floor."

She gave in, handing me a pillow and blanket.

I lay down on the floor, trying to stop the tears.

After a while, I heard Melissa's voice coming from the bed.

"Jackson, are you gonna be okay?"

Am I going to be okay?

"I don't know, Mel. I'm not so sure anymore."


	31. Nasty, Evil Dog

I woke up to voices coming from downstairs.

"Is Jackson here? It's really important."

"I haven't seen him, Nathan."

I could tell this was Melissa's father.

"Well, do you know if Melissa's talked to him?"

"I don't know. Let's go ask her. Follow me."

I heard footsteps coming up the stairs.

S***!

I bolted up and quietly hurried out onto the balcony, squishing myself against the wall.

From where I was standing, I could see Melissa's bed. I heard her door open.

"Melissa?" her father said. "Melissa, Nathan's here."

Melissa sat up, rubbing her eyes.

"Nathan want's to know if you've talked to Cody lately."

Melissa worriedly looked at the blanket and pillow on the floor, then toward the balcony. She didn't see me, though. "No. I haven't seen him," Melissa said.

"What's that cover doing on the floor?" her dad said suspiciously.

"Oh, uh, I was gonna sleep down there last night, but then I, uh...forgot."

After a moment, I heard footsteps coming toward the balcony.

S***!

I quietly put my legs over the balcony and jumped. I landed on my feet, frantically searching for a place to hide. I ran behind a doghouse tall enough for me to hide behind. Sitting down, I pulled my knees close against my chest.

I heard a thump, then a growl from above me.

S***!

I slowly lifted my head to find a pitt bull staring down at me.

The dog jumped in front of me.

"Go away!" I hissed quietly. "Get outta here!"

It stepped closer, growling louder.

"Good dog. Please, be quiet."

It came closer.

"You just had to have a pitt bull, didn't you, Mel?" I mumbled to myself.

In one quick motion, it leaped toward me and bit into my arm.

I tried to stay quiet, tilting my head up and against the doghouse in pain. Through clenched teeth, I said. "S***! F***! Let go, d***it!"

I heard the balcony door open.

I held my breath.

After a second, Melissa's father said, "Ned's got something again. It's probably a rabbit. I'll go get it."

"No!" Melissa said quickly.

"I gotta get it. What if it's Ms. Rice's cat from next door?"

"Nathan and I will get it."

"What?" Nathan said.

"C'mon, Nathan," Melissa grumbled.

The balcony door closed.

I exhaled. "Let go of me, Ned! I bet that name stands for Nasty, Evil Dog!"

His teeth were still in my arm, playing tug of war.

"D***it!" I pulled grass from the ground with my free hand. My eyes were squeezed together, my head still tilted up.

The back door opened.

I heard footsteps rushing toward me.

"S***!" I couldn't help but yell. "F***!"

"Jackson, are you okay?!" Melissa said.

"Does it look like I'm okay?" I snapped, opening my eyes. "S***!"

Melissa looked hurt.

"Sorry, Mel. I-ahhh! I didn't mean to." I was breathing hard. "Please, just tell it to let go."

"Ned, come here, boy," Melissa said in a baby voice. "Come here."

The dog bit deeper into my arm.

"Ahhhh! Nathan, get this f***ing dog off me!" I said.

"What am I supposed to do? Wave my magic wand and make it disappear?"

"That would be nice." Through clenched teeth, I yelled. "Ahhhhhhh! F***!" My free hand now clutched the edge of the roof of the doghouse. My knuckles were white.

"Ned, stop!" Melissa yelled.

The dog let go, then quickly bit my jacket pocket, tugging. It clawed at my arm.

"Ahhhh! S***!"

The pocket of my jacket began to rip.

"F***!"

The pocket ripped. A small bag fell to the ground.

The dog let go, tearing at the bag.

I relaxed.

"What's that?" Melissa pointed to the bag.

"Nothing. It's just-ahhhhh!"

Ned, finished searching the contents of the small bag, sank his teeth into my arm again.

"F***! Get off of me, d***it!" I slammed my head back into the doghouse.

Nathan realized what the bag was. "Jackson, I thought you were done with that?!"

"I am!"

"Then why do you have it?!"

"Jackson, what is he talking about?"

I didn't answer, just gripped the doghouse again, knuckles white.

Nathan spoke up. "Jackson had drugs hidden all over the pool house."

"What?!" Melissa shrieked.

"Mel, I can explain. But, please, get this d*** dog off me."

Melissa was silent.

I met her eyes.

She was shocked, frozen.

"Mel, please! Ahhhhhhh!" I dug my fingernails into the shingles of the doghouse roof. "S***! Nathan, c'mon, man! Ahhhh!"

Nathan hesitated, then said, "Ned, let go! Stop it!" He reached for it.

The dog panicked, going into attack mode. He pushed on my side, which was still a little sore.

I slipped sideways onto the grass in pain.

The dog was biting viciously. It came closer. One of its paws stepped onto my lower stomach.

"Ahhhh!"

Ned tried to get to my neck.

Nathan and Melissa were screaming at the dog, frightened.

I blocked the dog as much as I could.

He bit into my arms.

"Ahhhh! S***!"

"What's going on out here?!" It was Melissa's father. He looked at Melissa and Nathan, then saw me. "Oh, my-Cody, are you alright?!"

"Yeah, just peachy," I called sarcastically.

"Ned! Get in that doghouse! Right now!" Melissa's father said.

The dog immediately let go of me, then ran into his doghouse.

I lay there for a second before getting up.

"Cody, are you okay?"

I held my arm, panting. "Yeah. I'm good."

"I'll go call Nelson."

"No!" I held up my arm to stop him, then winced. "I mean, uh, I'm fine. Really."

"You sure?"

"Yeah."

"Alright, then." He headed inside with a shrug.

I leaned on the roof of the doghouse, exhausted.

"What are you doing with drugs, Jackson?! Are you taking them?" Melissa said.

"No, Mel. I-"

"Then why do you have them?"

I sighed, looking at my arm to avoid meeting their eyes. "'Cause I needed the money."

"You know you could have asked one of us. We would have gladly given you the money."

"I know that, Mel."

"Then why didn't you ask us?"

I looked at them. After a moment I spoke. "'Cause I hate being so dependent on you guys all the time. I wanted to do something for myself."

They were silent.

"Look. I'm really sorry. I won't do it again. I promise. But…I also promise that I won't ask you guys for nothing else." I turned to leave.

"Jackson, wait!" Melissa said.

I stopped, my back still facing them.

"We forgive you."

"It's okay, Mel. You don't have to keep me around just because you pity me." I started walking again.

"We don't pity you, Jackson."

I kept moving.

I could tell Melissa was heartbroken.

"Where are you gonna go?"

I stopped, turning to look at them. After a moment, I said, "I really don't know, Mel."

"Why don't you just stay here?"

"No! I told you. I'm not asking you for anything else."

"You're not asking," Melissa said. "I'm offering."

I looked into her eyes. "I...I can't."

"Yes, you can, Jackson."

I looked down, thinking.

"C'mon, Jackson. Please."

I sighed, giving in. "Okay."


	32. Faith For Finally, Almost

"Are you comfortable, Cody?"

"Yes, Mrs. Wu. Thanks."

"Do you need anything?"

"No, thank you."

"You sure? I could get you some-"

"I'm fine, Mrs. Wu. Thank you for letting me stay."

"It's no problem. Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Mrs. Wu flipped the light switch off, then headed to her room.

I lay on the couch for a while, fingering the cross around my neck, then got up and headed up the stairs. "Mel?" I knocked on the door softly. "Mel, you asleep?"

After a moment, the door opened. "Jackson? What do you want?"

"Melissa, can I talk to you?"

"Sure." She held the door open, then shut it when I walked in. She turned to me. "What do you want to talk about?"

I sat down on the bed. "On my last day in the hospital a month ago, I didn't mean to-"

"It's okay, Jackson."

"No, it's not, Mel. I didn't mean-"

"So, you didn't really mean what you said?"

I sighed, then looked into her eyes. "I did." I started talking fast. "But I shouldn't have said it. I-"

"It's okay, Jackson. I feel the same way."

"-I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. I didn't mean to make things weird between-" I just realized what she'd said. "Wait. What?"

Melissa sat down beside me, chuckling at my confusion. "I love you, Cody Jackson."

I felt her warm breath against my skin. Time seemed to slow as we leaned closer together. When our lips were about to touch, there was a knock on the wall, coming from Melissa's parents' room.

"I don't hear any talking in there."

Melissa and I laughed.

"Goodnight, Cody."

"Goodnight, Mr. Wu," I called. I stood up and walked to the door, then opened it, stepping out. Before I closed it behind me, I whispered, "I love you, Melissa Wu."

Thanks to all of my readers, especially jelissalover, adversary2113, Anora -and Victoria-, DreamingPoet1988, Sugar144, Joycelin Hades, danita3, and jessie.


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